A
female
age
30-35,
*aree02
writes:Im 16 and he is 21. That isn't the problem though. He has a girlfriend. I have spoken to him about it and the only thing he says is you know how i feel about the situation. He claims to love me but then he doesnt want to break up with his girlfriend or hurt her. How does this work? It doesn't. Please give me some advice on how to talk to him about it.
View related questions:
has a girlfriend Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, SoftlyCaress  +, writes (2 January 2009):
 Do you want to be just the other woman ?? It isnt very good feeling . Is he going to just lay you down and pick you up at his choosing ?? I dont think I would live like that you are young and there are plenty of men or guys out there and if you allow some man to just use you when they are ready and have a g/f then you need to get counseling cause this isnt right and any woman in their right mind would deal with it ...
A
female
reader, nokutenda  +, writes (2 January 2009):
let him go;you don't deserve to be the other girl
he will never leave his girlfriend because he doesn't have to,he can have you both.he isn't leaving his gf coz he loves her.
tell him its either you or the girl and mean it,if he continue to be with her,move on
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2009): Well let me say that i have been in this situation but i was older than you and he was 20, honestly he may love you but that isnt gonna help the situation cause he obviously loves her and really that is what matters. I was the other girl for nearly two years and it damaged me because no matter what happened i was always goin to be the other girl and honestly you are just going to be one of many other girls that he is using to avoid the problems in his own if there are any in his relationship. Save yourself from the heartache that will come eventually because even though it may be nice now it wont always be sneaking around and lying catches up with you eventually.
I would say end it now dont do what i did and stick around because you love him. In this situation Love is not important.
...............................
A
male
reader, pietry  +, writes (2 January 2009):
 He might be under emotional stress, not knowing what to do . He probably has feelings for both of you , and you can't compare love to different persons because it's different everytime. Perhaps he needs some time to choose or he cares about his current girlfriend ( not necessarily love but some kind of affection ) and he's afraid it might hurt her and he wants to find a better way to bring this up to her.
Or, he might actually love his girlfriend and he wants to use you.
You should talk to him and say you don't want to be a number two in his life and he should make up his mind before losing the both of you. That's what I should do
...............................
|
