A
female
age
30-35,
*yfuture
writes:I just started a relationship with a very close friend of mine. We just had our second date and he kissed me. Last night we were doing 20 questions. He asked me how far I had gone with my last boyfriend who I had a year and a half relationship with. I told him everything besides sex. To reiterate I've made out (french kissing), been felt up, I have been fingered a few times but did not really enjoy it, and I did give a blow job once and neither he or I was a fan of it. I asked my current bf the same question and he has only done first base( making out) with his ex gf of only 3 months. I am 19 and he will be 19 in a few months.After I told him I felt so trashy and slutty bc I had done those things and he had done so little. He was not the one to make me feel this way, it was me and he told me that I wasn't a slut and that I was in a relationship. I just need some reassurance that the things I did with my ex bf don't make me a slut since we did have a long term relationship. I feel so cheap. I'm wrong to feel that way right? My new bf and I are both virgins and that is/ was very important before we entered this relationship.Any input would be so helpful.
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blow-job, both virgins, cheap, ex girlfriend, first base, his ex, kissing, my ex Reply to this Question
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female
reader, myfuture +, writes (13 April 2010):
myfuture is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks everyone for telling me like it is. Slut may not have been the right word "almasdp". My perceptions about sex are not in any skewed and one day when that time comes I'm sure it will be a memorable experience(s). :)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2010): PLS..... Its totally normalll... I mean your like a saint compared to most 19 yo ! youre not cheap LOL! good luck !
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A
male
reader, Starmonster888  +, writes (12 April 2010):
 Initially, before actually reading the question, I thought you were going to tell us you've had sex with like 40 guys in a month or something!You are far from a slut. It's quite admirable that you're a virgin and, the fact that you even feel bad means you have a conscious. Sluts don't have a conscious, they have evolved to omit that part of their being.You've explored a little more than him, not a big deal. You're 19.
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A
female
reader, AnneDee +, writes (12 April 2010):
You are human, and humans explore sexuality and sexual acts. You are not a slut if you are a virgin. Down the road, you'll be glad you had the prior experience.
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A
male
reader, TimmD +, writes (12 April 2010):
 19 and still a virgin? You are absolutely not a slut. In fact, considering how things are out there now a days you should be commended.
From what you've told us all you have done is experimented with someone you were in a relationship with. Nothing wrong with that.
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A
female
reader, straight to the truth +, writes (12 April 2010):
firstly i would like to say if you are the age you say you are then you are far from a slut. you are 19yrs old and have been in a serious relationship and yet you still didn't go all the way. you should be proud of yourself for waiting.
there is no reason for you to be feeling this way and your new boyfriend obviously doesn't have a problem with it neither.
the Q&A part of relationship is always a tricky one as one of you will always have done more than the other, its just the way it is and its just the way your life has gone. like you say he has only ever been in a 3 month relationship which is very short term whereas you have been in a long term relationship so you were bound to have done more.
dont beat yourself up about it as you have done nothing wrong.
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