A
female
age
30-35,
*elpplease!
writes:I've had sex about fifteen times. With several different partners. I am seventeen and now have a boyfriend who i have sex with regularly. His size is not a problem, he's not massive but not miniscule either, quite perfect. He can get me to orgasm during fingering me. But when we have sex i dont feel anything, if i feel anything its pain. I have felt either nothing or pain everytime i have had sex. I used to think it was my partner, but i have been with four different partners. Will sex ever feel as good as being fingered? when? do i have a problem? help please!
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female
reader, penta +, writes (28 August 2007):
 Sounds like you're tensing up; if you're always concerned that it's going to be painful, then it's a self-fulfilling prophesy. The next time you're getting ready to do intercourse, try going VERY SLOWLY.
Have him finger you until you're almost ready to come, then SLOWLY enter you with his penis. A little at a time. Keep it there for a little while. Then have his SLOWLY move back and forth. He (or you) should continue to touch your clit while this is happening. Work up to full intercourse until it doesn't worry you anymore. Good luck.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2007): Hey, anon guy, you're wrong. I am the one with a vagina, so I know there is a G-Spot, and when I'm on top is the only time that it gets hit..and we don't do foreplay. I get on top, and do what I have to do to get off. That's that. I assume what the problem is is mental. You say you're comfortable with this man but what happened to you goes beyond that. It is still in your sub-conscious. You just need more time, you're so young. It will happen in time for you, don't give up.
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A
female
reader, helpplease! +, writes (28 August 2007):
helpplease! is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you all for your help!i know its not that im not wet enough because we mess around for at least an hour before.I've tried it on top and still felt nothing.maybe it is that i'm too tense.I have had a past of being forced into sex when not wanting to.But this time is different, i'm very comfortable with my boyfriend and love him very much.how do i get myself to not be so tense?
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A
female
reader, lildeesbg +, writes (28 August 2007):
 Have you ever orgasmed during sex? If you havent that is normal 60% of women dont. However, the pain part could be a few things, your either tense when you have sex with him, your not having enough lubercation, or you can have an infection and when he penetrates its irratiting the inside of your virgina.
Just for your own head go to a gynocologist to make sure everything is okie. If its not enough lubercation you can try more foreplay or jellies.
Just so you know intercourse can feel wonderful when you are relaxed and are in the moment. Things will be okie eventually.
~dee
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2007): Also, the concept of the G-Spot is debated. I HIGHLY doubt that there is one special place that the "thing" can "hit" to create immense pleasure. Pleasurable sex involves plentiful touching and caressing, too. My advice, don't rush it, take your time, and be safe!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2007): My past experiences along with my research has shown that everybody is different when it comes to their sexual pleasure, and that's completely normal! The best advice I can give is that if you do decide to engage in sex (safe sex, of course), be certain that you want to do it. Be comfortable not only with your partner, but with yourself as well. If you two truly care for one another, you will take the time to understand each others' bodies and turn ons. Sex shouldn't be a painful experience, so if pain is what you're feeling, then something should be done about that.
Also, intercourse alone is not always sufficient to reach sexual climax. Foreplay, touching, and kissing all make the experience much more enjoyable, both physically and mentally. Again, take the time to learn about each other, and never forget to practice safe sex!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2007): hi,seems to me your body tenses up when sexual intercourse is about to take place,ur happy an content to be fingered,but penetration is a no go,is there some past history involving unwanted sex,i experienced this problem when i was married,i tensed up as the thought of him inside of me was horrible this is were i felt pain or nothing
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2007): His thing just isn't hitting your g-spot. Try it in different positions. The only way I can feel it is if I'm on top. try it.
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