A
female
age
36-40,
*hinkingtomuch22
writes:My husband says he loves me, I believed him. I thought I felt the same. When I got pregnant with our child thats when he proposed to me. I said yes. I was going to wait till after the baby was born to get married but everybody kept asking me why wait? so we got married when I was 8 months pregnant.Well now I am starting to think I only said yes because I was having his child. In my heart I feel like our relationship is a fake because of how fast it happen. There is this guy at work. Nice, attractive, all n all great personality. I have been talking to him about the way I feel and he has been so supportive about everything. Now I feel alot for him. Not saying I love him I just feel I want the chance to get to know him better and hang out because I feel I want more with him but he has a g/f. He told me he liked me more then a friend while back, but dont know if he feels the same now really havent talked about it much but everything is the same and its getting deeper and deeper everyday I talk to him.Ever since I met this guy at work I feel like me and my husband were ment to be friends but I dont want anybody to get hurt. I just want to be happy and my heart is more happy when I am talking to this guy at work and I want to find out but he has a girlfriend and I dont want to come between that. I just wish I could talk to him about it but I am scared to tell him because I dont want him to hate me. Please help!!!!!
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female
reader, Jula21 +, writes (10 July 2010):
My advise for you is to for it talk to that guy let him know how you feel. Im in that situation now. My husband was my first my all my everything we started having problems and then he came along. He was sweet everything I needed to hear he said he won my heart. The more we talk the more we got closer. He has a girlfriend but he most not love her if his with me. It's almost been a year since we've been together behind everyones back but it's something that I wouldn't want u to go through I don't have the guts to get a divorce cause I have two lil boys, I don't love my husband but as long as he still with her I'll remain marry. So take ur chances and enjoy life ur still young
A
female
reader, abbeymom  +, writes (29 August 2008):
 You know it's very normal for woman who is pregnant to look at the man in her life and question everything... is he good enough for me...? Do I love him...? Did I ever love him...?I think what you are feeling for this co-worker who by the way is slightly taking advantage of you at the moment in your confused state to say he likes you more than a friend when he is supposed to be in a committed relationship with another woman. Is nothing more than flattery making you feel great.It's nice having attention.I know because I felt it. When I was pregnant with my first child, my now (ex) back then and I didn't always agree on things, the closer waivered and I began to wonder if I still loved him. I too had a great relationship with my boss at work. Flirting, talking about everything. I couldn't wait to go work!I came to realize though that as much as I wanted to get to know my co-worker more, as much as I enjoyed his company and his time and his doting over me. I owed it to myself to work on my relationship with my spouse and father of my child.What did I do? Well I began looking for another job immediately. Sure I missed the times with my co-worker but you know if you lean out a window long enough to look for something you just might fall out. So why not close it.You need your husband's support. You need time with him. You need to see (as the above poster) suggested if there is chance at real happiness.Real love is not lust. It's built on a foundation of getting to know one another over a period of time and learning to love and not love all the things you can about your partner.Those feelings that first crop up when you date someone eventually fade away. If your husband loves you don't ignore that. You owe it to yourself to open your heart up and try to be his friend, his partner and his lover along the way.I wish you the best with your decision~ Abbeymom
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A
female
reader, superrrshawna +, writes (29 August 2008):
 have you given your husband an honest chance at winning your heart? are you spending enough time with him, getting to know him?
your relationship got serious too fast, but that doesn't mean you can't still build a solid foundation with him. especially with a child on the way.
as for this other man... i recommend you don't do anything with him until you figure out that your husband is absolutely not right for you and you get out of that relationship. so tell him that you feel like you need to try and give your husband an honest chance first, and slowly back off of him.
because as of right now, you are married and he has a girlfriend and that is just not good for anyone involved!!
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