A
male
age
30-35,
*ylan6264
writes:Hey Dear Cupid peopleSorry this is long, but it's a story with many twists!I've never been able to understand girls but my ex girlfriend has gotta be the most confusing. We were together about a year...proper in love she said things like "I love you more than anything and i always will". we went thru a bad patch and we broke up, I agreed to everything she said (on the phone) so I didn't give any angry reaction, but I was dying inside. She told me "it would kill me to lose you from my life" and it sounded like she was gonna start crying so I said I had to go and she lingered on the phone and I went. I hear a week later I hear she has been in a club crying saying she doesn't feel like herself (not sure why, but her parents got divorced and it effected her and put a strain on our relationship)She also told a friend that she missed talking to me....We didn't speak for at least three weeks then to my horrible realization, it comes up on Facebook that she is in a relationship with some guy...a guy she has met after we broke up. A week later I see her in town and she jumps out of her skin and in a high pitched voice has "HEY, how r u?" I just say "Hiya, I'm good thanks" and I carry on walking. Later on, in a shop she sees me and gets all up tight and crosses her arms tight to her body and walks away. I kept hearing from people that she kept asking after me, asking home I am etc, telling them "make sure you tell him I asked how he is". :SFew days later I see her at this party and she gets mad that I'm there and cries and tells a friend "It's not just hard on him ya know". Makes out with her new bf in front of me then looking at me for a reaction...I gave none!!! Her bf has no idea that she had been crying over me outside!! She then comes dancing over to me says "hey, Wow!!! You smell nice!!!" and chit chats etc...I just think it's so weird to say that to an ex...think it sure, but don't say it to them!!Next she invites all our friends out to a bar...friends including my best friend!!!! No one went tho!Please could anyone explain to me these actions, coz I'm so confused!!!HELP!!
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best friend, broke up, divorce, ex girlfriend, facebook, my ex Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (22 March 2011):
 How many times are you gonna ask the same question dude?
A
male
reader, LovelessAct1  +, writes (22 March 2011):
Oh yeah, she definitely wants a reaction from you. Whether or not this is part of or outside her personality is for you to judge; it could be something that she just developed in her sadness over the break up. Either way, she wants you to be angry/jealous/sad/depressed; anything! She wants to see that you are very hurt. If you aren't good at getting that across in person or don't want to get emotional in front of her, I suggest sending her a message. In this message, describe just how you've been feeling since the breakup, how much it hurt you, and how it hurts that she's moved on with a new guy after only a few weeks (chances are she's just rebounding him to get a reaction out of you as well)BUT! Don't give her the satisfaction of thinking she got to you. Keep your dignity. Be the bigger person and finish by telling her that she can make her own decisions and that you hope in whatever she chooses to do that it makes her happy. Tell her that if she really ever needs you, you'll be there for her, but otherwise wish her a good life.That's the best reaction you could hope to give: honesty. You want to be honest with her so that she knows how she hurt you, yet show her that you're trying not to be bitter and truly hope for the best for her future.Whether or not you want her back or would get back together with you, this will put you in a good spot to move on with your life until she gets her act together and decides what she wants. I realize its tough to move on from someone you love, but if they truly need you in their life they'll always find their way back. Good luck.
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A
male
reader, shawncaff +, writes (22 March 2011):
 I think the key is what you wrote here:
"I agreed to everything she said (on the phone) so I didn't give any angry reaction."
She WANTS a reaction from you. You both broke up, but she wanted to feel the relationship meant something to you. So she's been provoking you and teasing you ever since.
Maybe it's your nature to be unemotional and tight-lipped, but if you want her to calm down and be more normal with you, then I think you should talk to her and write her a letter expressing your feelings...so she knows you have them.
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