A
female
age
36-40,
*ovely15
writes: I've been seeing this guy for a little under two months. The first couple dates we went on we made out and it was super hot. He suggested we wait a couple weeks to have sex... i told him we should wait 3 months. He reluctantly agreed. Since then, we've been hanging out, going out to eat, sleeping at each other's places, have a really fun date planned on Friday and we seem to get along well. We have never made out as passionately as the first time we hung out and I'm worried that he's kind of losing interest in me. For example, the other night he bought us pizza, made a blanket bed in front of the tv and when the movie was over, he started making out with me and then stopped all abruptly. I have tried giving him head once but he made me stop pretty quickly which I later found out was because he was feeling insecure because he hadn't showered since the day before (understandable i guess). He doesn't really initiate hanging out with me or text me as often as he did last month (he does once in a while). I find it really weird that he hasn't tried to go any further since then. Like I said, we have a date Friday but I'm not sure if I want to go with him if I don't talk to him about what he thinks/feels about me first. I'd rather just go with a friend because it's going to be a really memorable and fun experience and I don't want to remember it with some guy that isn't even interested in me. I like him but I know what it looks like when a guy likes me and unfortunately, I don't think this one does. I should also add that we work together which is why I'm being so cautious with him.. starting to think it was a good idea. So I'm wondering if I should call him and be open and honest about how I'm feeling. What's the worst that could happen... right?
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female
reader, Lovely15 +, writes (6 April 2011):
Lovely15 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the answers! I planned the date friday bcuz ive had tickets for months!. I think im just going to talk to him to see if hes still interested in me. I dont care if i come off as needy.. I dont need to be wasting my time. If he still wants to date me then im sure he will put up a fight when i tell him i think i should bring someone else and if not i have friends that would be more fun to go with. I called him late last night and left a voicemail telling him to call but he hasnt called back. Ill text him around 2:00 if he still hasnt responded.
A
male
reader, yesno +, writes (6 April 2011):
You're my hero! A woman who actually makes a man wait!!! I can only hope this is behavior you have modeled through your life! In any case, bk123, is right. Don't rush. He's still hanging around, so you are golden. If they passion was there, it will come back. You have done the right thing! You are redeeming my faith in women!
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A
female
reader, StarryEyes101 +, writes (6 April 2011):
I think he is backing off a bit incase the making out gets so hot that he get's turned on and he doesn't wanna rush having sex with you. Ask him if he is still interested coz he seems a little distant, but I don't think you have anything to worry about. I think he is a strong guy for holding back on not having sex. I know some would have lost interest by now. Who planned the date for Friday? Him? or You?
If he wasn't interested he would have made some sort of excuse by now. Then he would eventually break things off. But I don't think thats gonna happen
Good Luck and I hope this helps
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A
male
reader, BK123 +, writes (6 April 2011):
Sex is not as important to you as it is to him, a long term, secure relationship is what you want, and since he has a lifetime to be with you, he should totally understand your feelings and go with them. Don't give in to sex, secure the relationship first, if you are feeling cautious, its because you have a good reason to.
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