A
female
age
26-29,
*aby234
writes:ok so i been dating this boy for 2 weeks and i feel so embarrssed like everyone says im to pretty for him and that he is ugly and stuff and i just feel sad and im not attracted to him either and he is in love with me and im afraid if i break up with him it will ruin our friendship also i think im lesbian because before i started dating him i was dating girls and i think im into girls then into guys. what should i do?
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female
reader, Red591 +, writes (20 March 2013):
 why did you even date him if you were not attracted to him. You have to have attraction to even start to date or it is doomed. Attraction comes in many forms though. It isn't always an abercrombie face on a MMA body. However, if there is no initial spark even small one then don't have a second date at all. It just hurts people and it's mean.
A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (1 March 2013):
 Just rip off that bandaid! He's not in love after 2 weeks. He may think he is, but you're both really young.
Always remember to do what makes YOU happy. If the person you're with doesn't make you happy, then you don't belong with them.
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A
female
reader, Euphoric29  +, writes (28 February 2013):
Dear OP,
Let me tell you this from experience: Never date someone out of pity or in order to not hurt his feelings. This never goes well. If you don't have true feelings for someone, just let it be.
No matter if ugly or not, people want true love and not just pity or friendship in a relationship.
Yes, if you break up it will probably hurt him. But if you wait and wait.. you will hurt him later, after he's developed even more feelings and after you pretended for too long that you liked him.
Yes, it's sad that people say he's ugly and I think it's nice you're not being mean to him.
But if there's no attraction it would be better if you're just friends.
Since you don't know if you're a lesbian - this is a perfect reason or excuse to break up with him and not hurt his feelings too much.
By the way: If girls say a guy is ugly but you still like him, don't listen to their talk. Girls can change their opinion like they change clothes.
You know, I had a boyfriend when I was 13. First, all the girls were like "oh, he's got a really big nose, he looks like a bird with a big beek.. and his ears.. like a donkey, ugh.. and he's got this weird laughter.." and after I started dating him, they suddenly all found him sooo cute and one of my best friends tried to separate us behind my back. Girls can be such bitches! After we broke up, he became the most popular guy of my class, and then of the whole year. Now, it wasn't because I was attractive and raised his image or something. It was just that they suddenly realised what a catch he was when they saw how happy we were.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (28 February 2013):
The only other option is to marry him.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2013): It's ok, you're not being mean. This is just life. Just tell him that you like him, you think he's a great guy, but that you're both too young to get serious, and you don't want to hurt him. That you want to stay friends.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (28 February 2013):
 Tell him your mother told you you aren't allowed to date yet. My mother gave me this 'out' and it was very helpful. That way, you can stay friends with him, as that seems to be important to you.
I wouldn't worry too much about dating just yet, as it sounds as though you really aren't ready yet. It's fine. There's plenty of time.
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