A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Little advice here please! I had an abortion last year and only told my best friend, and sister. They encouraged me to have the abortion, and at the time I thought it was for the best. I was in the middle of exams and just weren't ready for a baby. Now my boyfriend's friend, who dated my sister, has been dropping hints about starting a family, and I'm convinced that he knows about the abortion. He's 100% against them, and would never forgive me. We're been together 3 years, and are looking into living together when I go to university. I don't know whether I should tell him and explain why I did it, or keep it hidden. The guilt is getting way too much for me. To make it worse his sister has just had a baby, so it's the worst possible time for all this to come out.
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abortion, best friend, university Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, 24yeahright  +, writes (10 March 2009):
I aint exactly for abortion, but I wouldn't want a person who I deeply cared about to keep it from me. I'd understand.
You ought to just tell him.
A
female
reader, MommyOfOne  +, writes (10 March 2009):
 I would first ask how he would feel if his partner had an abortion. If he says it would be a deal breaker, you have to figure out if now is the right time to tell him, if you ever do? Wouldn't it be good to just wait for a better time?
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A
female
reader, loving arms +, writes (9 March 2009):
Poor you, it must have been difficult to come to your decision and even now things are stressful.
your boyfriend might be a 100% against abortion but it is not him who has to carry and change his life plans for a unplanned baby. His opinion is also based on what he thinks rather than how he would have felt if it was actually his baby rather than a hypothetical one.
I am taking it the aborted child was his as your relationship has been so long. So the issue here is how forgiving would he be? Will telling him end your relationship? Will continuing to hide it cause you too much misery?
There is no right answer babe. Good luck with whatver you choose to do and I wish you all the best at uni xx
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