A
female
age
41-50,
*urmal
writes:Iv been in a relationship for 4 months and 2 weeks ago we had our first argument my boyfriend said that I put him on the spot when Im drunk and ask questions like "why are you with me" after the argument I said I love him for the first time and he took it fine but didn't say it back, he talked about it the next day and was fine, now a week on I feel as though he is being abit distant, less email and text contact but he makes plans to see me and is ok but not as affectionate as before.I don't know if he wants out and doesn't know how to do it or what he is thinkingwhat should I do, most people would say leave it and see what happens but I want to say something but am a little bit scared incase its pressure and in his head nothing is wrong
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female
reader, nurmal +, writes (17 May 2007):
nurmal is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you again for your helpful advice, Im back in a difficult place I asked if he is going to go travelling and he is and he is thinking of going at the end of the year for qrather a long time maybe a year or forever I was kinda in a daze to ask all the details I would go with him if he asked but i want it to come from him and not me because I really want him to want it, I have dropped a hint that I would like to go travelling but he hasnt asked me or anything. But we have only been together 6 months and its allot of pressure to go travelling together but I dont think I can carry on seeing him for the rest of the year and then wave him off I think that would hurt to muchshould I just ask him if its a consideration for us or wait and just and see what happens, I hate to say it but I feel pretty stressed out with the not knowing and keep wondering if he is just going to call it of beecause he is going away.
A
female
reader, nurmal +, writes (2 April 2007):
nurmal is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you so much for your helpful advice it worked I backed off and just went back to having fun with him and everything has sorted itsself out and we are together and things are better than ever, the only problem is that from day one he has mentioned about moving o Australia possibly next year and Iv always been causiouse about getting to involved with him but Im liking him more and more and Im confused about what to do really because I dont want to end it because he might go but then I dont want o fall for him only to have to wave goodbye to him in 9 months time.He cannot give a definate answer whether h is going or not because he doesnt know himself.I jst feel as though I have found someone that I could see a future with but I would never want to hold someone back
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A
female
reader, sunrise +, writes (13 March 2007):
 Hi, perhaps he doesn't know how to react when you question him about why he's with you, he may even think you doubt him. You've not been together long and for him to tell you he loves you is a big step, for some people it rolls of the tongue but not always meant, he obviously wants to be sure that what he says is what he actually feels.I would rather have someone tell me they love me because they want to and that they mean it, not because they feel it is expected to be said or to keep me happy.just enjoy your relationship, have fun, be friends and what ever will be, will be.Pressure kills a relationship. x
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A
female
reader, kelpel +, writes (13 March 2007):
you've only been together for a short time, just go with the flow and see how things are - the only way to really know if he wants out is to ask him. just go out together and have a laugh, if its meant to be it will be! too many of us worry so much about what the future holds we forget to enjoy what we have. xxx
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