A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:I'm 17 and have recently been feeling a LOT of pressure to drink alcohol lately. This pressure has been coming from many people at my part time work (most of them are over 18- the legal drinking age in australi), one of my close friends and my boyfriend. Some background information: I have always been very against drinking. I guess this is partlyy due to my parents influences. They have never dranken alcohol since I have been born. They did when they were younger but gave it up. So obviously I have grown up with attitudes to be totaly against it. I have been hurt many times by people because they have been drinking. So this makes me be even more against alcohol. And I, unlike many other people, aren't in denial of the effects of alcohol.Ok so basicaly, my problem is dealing with this pressure. Everyone keeps trying to convince me to drink when I dont want to. I am so sick of it. Why can't they just accept that I don't want to drink. I mean, i dont like people drinking, but i accept that alot of them drink alot and i dont try and force them to stop. why cant they do the same for me? Its hard enough for me havign to put up with them and their stupid alcholic ways of beliefs (thinkign that the world ends if there is no alcohol, the only way to have fun is by drinking and drinking when ur upset 'solves' your problems etc) but to have to be made to feel like im a loser because i dont, is even worse. Not only is the pressure to drink an issue, but since next year I will be 18 (legal age for drinking) so i fear the issue will be come worse. A lot of older people i know, all they seem to do is drink whe nsocialising. Like if they hang out with friends, its at a club or a pub or a party- somewhere alcohol is available. I dont wanna go to those places because the pressure is even stronged, plus i dont like being around people when they are totaly drunk. they say things they dont mean and regret them the next day. My boyfriend keeps saying that when i turn 18, hes taking me out clubing and we are going to drink. i dont know why he would say that when he knows how much im against it. same as for my close friend, shes known me for 5 years and she said that when we both turn 18 next year 'we r going to go out and get drunk'. and heaps of people at work keep saying they cant wait till i turn 18 so i can drink. its like they dont understand that i dont drink because i dont WANT to. not because im not old enough.how can i get people to accept my choice to not drink? how do i deal with this pressure? i dont feel like im going to give in, but it offends me alot when people tyr to convince me. its like they are saying my beleifs and values are worthless and like they can just take them away or something. Sorry that was so long. But thanks to anyone who reads it.
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female
reader, pica +, writes (15 October 2006):
Because you are making a stand about it - and good for you - people will take that as a challenge and want you to drink all the more. It might be better to play this down - even say "tried it but didn't like it". Stick to your guns, not everyone drinks. Be prepared to be called boring and to be left out of social things but I think if you make friends who also aren't interested in drinking you'll have strong friendships and more cash!
A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (14 October 2006):
 I can understand your feelings right now. Nobody likes to feel that kind of pressure. You might be a little bit over concerned about it though.
You sound mature for your age while your friends sound like they're going through a phase that is quite common. Neither of you is really wrong, although you'll probably get into less trouble. I drink. The problem is we tie it into our social fabric. It's something we " DO". There is really no need for it. It's quite ridiculous actually. Somebody could very easily sit down and drink a six pack of beer but would probably never sit down and drink six cans of Coke.
You have to accept that they have the weakness at this moment. You're the strong one. Just stand your ground. IF they are true friends they will adapt to your decision.
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A
male
reader, Abacadaba  +, writes (14 October 2006):
 Peer pressure can be a very powerful thing, just ignore them, not like they can force you to drink can they? just lay the rules, speak to them seriously and say you dont want to. And make sure you DONT drink just because people want you to, stick to your morals. And remember, if you do decide to drink, enjoy responsibly, no need to get plastered and be sick everywhere just because everybody else does, enjoy yourself, weather it with or without drink.
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A
female
reader, Toria +, writes (14 October 2006):
 You have a right to make decisions about whether you drink or not and you've made the decision that you just don't want to drink, this may go away or you may never want to but that is your choice and no one should make you feel pressure about this, you need to talk to them and tell them that you don't have a problem with them drinking but you really just don't want to drink yourself and that you can have just as much fun without drink and prefer it that way, you need to make it clear to them that you not drinking is your choice and its unfair of them to make you feel that you should be doing something you really don't want to for your own reasons not because your just wanting til your 18 as this decision still sticks then too.
I personally don't drink myself I use to but I stopped a long time ago as I just didn't enjoy it and I wasn't all that keen on the taste of it and I found I could have just as good a night if not better when drinking soft drinks especially as I prefer the taste of them and for a certain amount of time I would always get my friends saying go on have a drink with us and you need to relax and have a drink so you can enjoy the night and let your hair down I was so frustrated as I can relax, enjoy the night and let my hair down without alcohol and I'm quite proud that I don't go out and have to drink to have a good time and I just told them this and now I don't get any problems they drink their alcohol and I drink my soft drinks.
Good luck :o)
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