A
female
age
36-40,
*onfusedlover
writes: I have been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years now. After about 2 weeks of dating him I cheated on him. I was truly sorry. I wish I could turn back time. But I can't. Maybe about 6 months after I confessed to him because it was eating me inside. Now two years later I found out that ever since that day, he's been constantly cheating on me. I've lost count of how many girls he's slept with while he's been with me. I love this man to death. We just had a miscarriage and I found out he was seeing someone else while this all happened. I've forgiven him after all he's done to me and yet he still hasn't forgiven me after 2 years. So we've talked things over he says he wants to forgive me. I love him, I do see a future with him. I want to marry him, have kids with him and grow old with him. Anybody have advice?
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female
reader, AskEve +, writes (11 March 2007):
You cheated on him 2 weeks into the relationship, hardly even a relationship then was it? The fact he is continually cheating on you is bang out of order. He has got into a bad habit! Him saying he WANTS to forgive you is just his card to continue to cheat until he decides different. I suggest you have another talk with him. Let him know you're sorry for what's happened in the past for BOTH of you but you can't change that, however you CAN change the present.
You want, from this minute on, to start afresh. Everything out in the open, new beginnings. Make a promise to one another there and then to always talk things over together and to always be faithful to one another. Let him know if he breaks this promise and does cheat on you again then it's over and then he can see as many women as he wants to. If he loves you or has any respect for you then he'll agree. If he says "I'll try," tell him trying's not good enough!
If he does continue to cheat or says no he can't promise then I would end the relationship with him as there's no love there with him. Okay, so you made a mistake but don't we all? You deserve much better than him if he can't be faithful to you and if he cheats again then I would get out his life and find someone who will love you exclusively.
Eve
A
female
reader, aunty t +, writes (11 March 2007):
You made one mistake so this gives him the right to sleep with as many people as he wants. I dont think so. Fair enough if he felt he had to even the score (which is very childish) a quick fling could be forgiven, but what he has done is unforgiveable. He couldnt even give it a rest while you had a miscarriage. A time when you really needed him. Im sorry but this guy is not marriage material. I know that you probably dont want to hear this but he is taking you for a ride. Why should he stop now he is having a great time and still has you by his side. And he still hasnt forgiven you after 2 years for one mistake. God he just gets better and better. Im sorry if you feel im being hard on you but he is making a fool of you. Also if he has slept with so many women and having unprotected sex with you he could have an std and be putting you at risk. I know you dont want to hear this but why do you want to marry someone who has no respect for you and treats you so badly. How will you ever trust him again. Think very carefully about this as it could all end in tears
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