A
female
age
26-29,
*unshine'Girl
writes:This is really embarrassing.Ok here goes.I think I might be a Bisexual.I mean I really like guys and that'll never change (in fact I'm kind of in love with this guy, and I think he likes me too)But here's the thing. I get turned on by girls. When we're changing for PE, I sometimes can't stop staring at the other girls bodys. It's really embarrassing!I don't know how to tell anyone as a few of my friends are homophobic, and I can't talk to my parents about it. It's just too embarrassing!What shall I do? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, sheperd  +, writes (8 July 2009):
hey there! just stumbled on to this and felt compelled to offer a guy's perspective. I think it's safe to say that you are a normal smart young person. You relize something about yourself and instead of bottling it up and trying to ignore it you are trying to figure it out. Kudo's to you for the first solid step in a journey that will last you for the rest of your life. I've growin up in a small logging town all of my life and the last thing (especially for a young man) anybody would ever want to be called is bi-curious. That being said.. I noticed from a young age that I was always checking out the other young men around me, I was worried for the longest time that I might be gay even though I loved everything about women. At some point during high school I started testing myself and by that I mean that I would look at a boy admire his body or something else about him, and then in my mind I would put myself in some sort of sexual position or fantasy with him. When I did this I could never take it to far before I grossed myself out. You can try this trick for yourself and see if it helps. What it did for me is, 1. confirm that I wasn't interested in boy's in a sexual manner but more just an admirer of something beautiful. and 2. helped me work through the problem on my own. I find that if you put enough positive and intelligent thought behind something you can usually figure it out on your own. In any case I wouldn't worry about it to much because no matter if you are bi or gay your still going to be who you are and who you want to be. The only one that can change that is you. Work daily to change yourself for the better and try and forget any negative thoughts, strive for compassion,laughter,honor,pride in the good things about yourself, and you'll be doing better than 75% of the rest of the world. And keep visiting positive sites like these because all of the advice that I read from the ladies above was sound.P.S. Being gay or bi in my eyes isnt something to be ashamed of, be proud of who you are be strong and other people will notice. The ones that can open thier eye's to the rest of you are the ones that are insicure about themselves. Take care and live a long adventure filled life:)
A
female
reader, The Shadow's Tears +, writes (1 June 2009):
 Hi!,sweetie i know what this is, your bi-curious, well that and your coming to the age where your realizing the bodies growth patterns. Bi-curious is something almost every girl goes threw, its connected to trying to find out who you are and its completely natural. i think you might be going threw this. and don't worry it's not that big of a deal. i'm classified as being "to relaxed with my love life" which means i like guys, but am so relaxed with knowing i like guys, i'm not afraid to kiss a woman, or watch them change.(others call me bi without the commitment- I'll show affection to a girl without dating her) but i don't think you at this stage of your life yet. just don't worry to much about it, your still growing, it's natural to be curious. so it's nothing to be embarrassed about, but you can PM me if you want to talk OK?X: Shadow tears
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2009): your not bi or gay
dont worry
ur just learning about your body and comparing it to other women :) ur fine!
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A
female
reader, ilovebowsandcherries +, writes (1 June 2009):
 hun all people go through these things.
i mean alot of girls get turned on by other girls
doesn't nesscessarily make them bi sexual just fantasy i suppose.
i mean if you really think you are isn't there one true friend you know you can trust?
i mean when you stare don't make it obvious because someone may pick up on it and start a rumour or something.
but try talking to a close friend.
or something.
Hope this helps.
x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2009): You are at the age where you are becoming body aware. Is there a possibility that you are simply looking for reasons of curiosity? Your body is changing into that of a woman, not a girl, and feelings can get pretty messed up. Do you aspire to look like other females, or do you find it attractive? These are things you need to consider and think about.
Do not worry about homophobic people, you need to live your own life. Only confide in those you trust completley for now, as the last thing you need is to be given a hard time over this.
I would like to say that, whether you are gay, straight, bi, or whatever else, don't hide yourself. Be you, be happy : ) good luck !!!!!
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A
male
reader, Who +, writes (1 June 2009):
 “When we're changing for PE, I sometimes can't stop staring at the other girls bodys. It's really embarrassing!...What shall I do?”
Well, in the changing room, learn to be cool and sly. Stare at the floor and just look out of the corner of your eye. Don’t stare directly at any one. When talking to another girl, look her in the eye the whole time.
“I don't know how to tell anyone as a few of my friends are homophobic, and I can't talk to my parents about it. …What shall I do?”
If you have enough access to the internet I’m sure you can find plenty of girls & women who are happy to talk to you about these things. Including on this site.
A couple of more things:
1. Whatever you are will become apparent over time, but most teen agers send some time figuring out what they are.
2. Look at any ladies fashion magazine (Elle, Maria Clair, etc) and they all have photos of nude or half nude models. Straight women like to look at other women’s bodies as well as bi and lesbian women.
Hope this helps.
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A
female
reader, Anastasia  +, writes (1 June 2009):
 Hey Sunshine Girl,
First thing you do is breathe and relax. This is just your curiousity showing itself up.
What you can do is perhaps not make it that obvious to the girls that you are staring at their bodies, it might make them speculate and then it might put you in a bit of a situation with your friends.
Isn't there at least one friend who you can trust, or a cousin maybe. Sometimes a friend might be just as curious as you but is ashamed to say anything because they think that their friends would judge them....
If you don't feel comfortable, you can all talk to your auntys on here = )
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