A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Can someone please give me advice, my dad wont listne to anyone who tells him to stop bieng so irrisponsible with alcohol and drugs.He regulerly smokes cannabis and drives, which really scares me. Yeserday he asked me if he could borrow for money for "weed", witch made me feel so uncomfortable, he assured me, he wouldnt get off his head or anything, as usual. I said no but he managed to get some anyway and low and behold that very night he was found slouched against a wall downstairs after falling over. When he got upstaires he threw up, better that doing it in your sleep. Its not like he is not harming anyone with this, one time when he was drunk off whiskey, he took a bath. Luckily i asked him something from the landing only to hear jiberish in return. I got my mum from downstairs to listne and we knew something was wrong when we smelled smoke. After telling him to get out of the bath because of our concern, he opened the door. When we went in the whole room was full of choking smoke, he was so out of it he didnt even notice the smoke coming from where he had threw a "joint", he kept saying that their was no smoke. It was so bad i had to get on the floor to stop myself from choking. I know this whole story might sound pathetic, but what about if i hadnt of tried to shout him through the door, him found dead from smoke inhalation? house burnt down? who knows. This has gone on for years but the point of this is that i really dont want my dad to die like this. He is already 57 and i am 17, so what do i do, whenever i try and talk to him about it he either denies it, argues or avoids the subject. I know that no one changes unless they want to, and he doesnt want to. Please help me and dont take the mick because its not funny!
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female
reader, mimisoph3  +, writes (1 June 2008):
 omg my dad is exactuly the same only he doesn do weed or drugs he just smokes cigares and his like addicted to that shit and alcohol its crazy he has these secret things he does and he hides it he had cancer and he got surgery done and i guess now he doesnt have cancer anymore but the doctor says he should stop smoking but my dad things that they dont know anything and my mom tells him too but the more we tell him to stop the more he doesnt so just make sure he doesnt hurt himself like my dad is hurting himself
A
female
reader, Gio  +, writes (30 May 2008):
Hi,It is a very difficult situation you are going through. Seeing your dad destroying himself like that and maybe feeling impotent to do anything about it. I don't know how it is in your country, but I am assuming an adult cannot be forced to undergo a treatment if they don't willingly accept to do so. Here is a site that may give you some ideas, perhaps you would like to contact them?: http://www.seabrookhouse.org/If you can record/tape him when he is at his worse, so when he is sober he can see how low he gets, and the risks he is putting you and your mum in, maybe then he will want to do something about it. I hope the people at seabrook house can give you more solutions, as they have been dealing with problems like your dad's. If you go to church, talk to your priest, he might also know of another organisation close to you.All the best. Gio
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A
female
reader, pepper27 +, writes (27 May 2008):
 Hi Hunny
I really feel for you Ive seen this first hand and its not nice, You really need to post this on the main problem page so you get as many answers as you can sweetheart...This situation is going to get you so down hunny ,You could talk to your father but I dont think you will get through to him it seems that things have got so out of hand...
http://www.drug-aware.com/tackling-drug-addiction-parents-families.htm
http://www.al-anonuk.org.uk/alateen/index.asp
These sites have a number and may be able to help hunny in confidence....To guide and help you with the best thing to do and give you the support you need to cope, I hope that they can give you some advise and light at the end of the tunnel WITH LOVE AND PRAYERS MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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A
female
reader, MARISSA +, writes (26 May 2008):
 OK!Every single boyfriend my mother had used drugs !Now look i may only be 13 but trust me i know what im talking about i have been thrugh so much.. Well the first thing you need to do is sit down and have a talk with your dad but only when hes sober and if hes not go stay with a friend !He needs to know how you feel about him doing this .Talk to him and maybe he'll understand what hes messing up in his life what hes losing .Try telling him what this stuff can do to him ask him if he wants to die or get sick. If none of this works try calling a doctor like a shrink maybe for HIM this might help him get his mind of drugs !Now if this does not work please write againand i can always be helpful .....ALL THE BESTMARISSA
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