A
female
age
36-40,
*arah.g
writes:I need help on this!i was in a relationship with someone whom i loved..we are both born again bt he break up with me after he told me he never loved me he loves other girls and infact GOD didnt tell him to marry me..even though it was hard for me 2 accept it,i later take it as it is...only few months passed by,he asks me if i can be hs friend and so I acceptd,since he doesnt work and has got no one to take care of him[financially],im still helping him coz of the pity and the care that i have for him.Now my fear is,i will be hurt again if he happen to get another girl because i still do love him...im still jelous of him..should i stop the connection with him before al these things happen? and my last question is;ist good to communicate with your ex? i dont know what to do, i might in the future ending up in relationship with someone but i will still love my ex-fiance because of the connection/communication that i have with him.please help!!!!!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2010): You will never get over him if he is still in your life...you need to cut contact with him and start the grieving process. If you are not familiar with the grieving process, it involves the following stages, but not in any particular order...denial, bargaining, anger, grief or anguish and finally, acceptance. Without cutting complete contact with him, you will not enter the grieving process and therefore will continue to be in love with him :(
A
female
reader, Ich_liebe_dich  +, writes (26 February 2010):
 If you can not handle your emotion then better stay away from this guy. Why you need to support him? and why you are letting him to that to you? Hey" you are still young and sound's pretty and nice person. Why you need to put your energy and money to this person who dont even deserve any of your single time. Stop with this pity feelings, stop dreaming that someday maybe he will love you dearly because you are helping him financially. Stop that thinking. Are you paying for his love? you dont deserve that. You deserve better than he is. Dump him, do it for your self. I wish you good luck anyway.
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A
female
reader, AngiR  +, writes (26 February 2010):
I have been there! Cut it off. If you have to, help him out one last time, and tell him that's it. No more money from you. He will have to get a job. If he can't work, there are programs to help him. He will not starve to death. He doesn't care about you. Chances are he doesn't care about anyone but himself. You will be hurt if he gets another girlfriend. You have to let it go and move on. And let him learn to take care of himself. You are actually harming him by enabling him. I know it isn't easy, but you have to do it! Good luck!
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (26 February 2010):
Wake up young lady. No disrespect, but you're a bit naive if you think he wants anything other than to use you for money. I know that hurts, but you need to hear it because you are wasting time and money on a man who doesn't care for you at all (he said he never loved you). Stop with the pity and the care because he's taking advantage. At some point he will just drop you again. End all contact with him.
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