A
male
age
30-35,
*drsep4
writes:hi just started dating my best friend. We've been friends since her last relationship and well she's a really "friendly" person. I know cause when we were friends she kinda cheated of her bf. We nvr did anything that's considered cheating but with things we said and all the things we did together(bf stuff) well I'll admit that's not traditional cheating but look wat happened cause of it. However alot had to do witthe fact that she was unhappy and that I(don't wanna brag its true) was so much better than her old bf. I was just wondering where to draw the line with her guy friends cause I can't tell her wat to do. I wanna trust her but its the one side of her I'm not so familiar with. I just want to be prepared
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male
reader, StudentOfLife  +, writes (8 August 2008):
 If you start to create boundaries, that's when she'll want to get out.
When does a prisoner want to get out of jail? When he's in it of course.
When does a girl want to get out of relationship? When it feels like a prison.
She loves you, she agreed to be your girlfriend. If she wasn't forced into this relationship, why would she cheat? If she does, it only means that she didn't really love you.
Would you prefer being in a relationship with someone, you just found out, doesn't love you back? Or find someone that will give love back.
People tell me that the most important thing in a relationship is trust. If that's the case for you, I understand but trust should never become an issue or a source of hassle.
When you have trust problem it tends to ruin moments that would have been beautiful without the trust issue.
Why is it that every time we're happy, or mind find ways to put negative thoughts in us?
A
female
reader, SuperSammie  +, writes (8 August 2008):
 hi there, my currant bf has the same problem with me, i was still with my ex when my bf and i got together.
and we are now living together and everything but he will still question if i have cheated when i have been out with my mates.
you can't tell her that you want her to stop being mates with other guys because then she will feel you are controlling her life.
you should respect that she has male friends and understand that she will want to spend time with them.
but you should tell her how you feel, and tell her you feel uncomfortable with how much time she spends with them.
but she was probably only so close to you while she was with her ex because she may have been confused about who she likes more, and she choose you! which means that she likes you and values you as a friend and a boyfriend.
hoep this helps x
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A
female
reader, BendychickP  +, writes (8 August 2008):
 Just explain to her how you are feeling. Don't make her out to be a really awful person, that cheats and lies, just explain to her that you feel a little insecure because of the way your relationship started. Also say that it is okay for her to have male friends, you just feel a little worried sometimes. Hopefully she'll understand. Best wishes.
Bendy xx
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