A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am always the girl next door. I have had two long term relationships and with both men, it was about them loving my personality. It was never because I am sexy, or hot its because men feel comfortable in my presence. I want men to really feel passionate about me.One boyfriend even went so far as to tell me that he loved the fact that I read books and could hold a conversation and that he could talk to me for hours. What the HELL does that mean? Everyone reads and can talk! And thats just it, all me and a guy ever do is talk! I am 26 and STILL a virgin. as i said, I have had two long term relationships and both almost ended in marriage, but I had to leave as I knew they didn't love me as a a woman but because of superfical reasons like I had a good personality. I want to be one of those women who makes men spend money, and lose themselves in. I want to argue with passion with my man and I want to be able to do ANYTHING and still have the guy run around after me. How do I do this?
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female
reader, mizz.butterflies +, writes (30 January 2011):
 so what is it...you wanna look like megan foxx and have men drooling...? dont you know they will just see u as a sex object?
men can find sex everywhere.what they CANNOT FIND is a woman they can talk to.
Now,if you wanna be more attractive to men...Lose some weight (I have the feeling ur cute yet chubby),dress a bit sexier and that's it.
Have a positive outlook on life....
As far as the money part goes...
I was going out with a guy who could barely afford to buy me lunch..
And another dude bought me a laptop just because.
Now,this isnt because OF ME.its because of their FINANCIAL status.
U should worry more about a man treating u like a lady,other than him spending money on you.
Are you a down-low goldigger??
As for u being a virgin,why didnt u sleep with the 2 guys uve been with?
U say u want men to be crazy about u...well after 1-2-3 months u should sleep with them? When a man doesnt have sex ,he will start looking at the girl as his sister.
WAKE UP!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2011): What do you mean you left these guys because "I knew they didn't love me as a woman but because of superfical reasons like I had a good personality."?As a woman, I find this part of your post offensive. If a personality is superfical, then I suppose the core element of a woman is T and T? Thanks. You sound like you want to live in a cheap romance novel. Unfortunately in the real world, most relationship drama doesn't consist of men going to extreme lengths to prove their love, ruin themselves financial, and become suicidal on your behalf. In the real world, drama consists of cheating, day to day fights, peoples insecurities and wanting to be reassured, and luckily the moments where people feel close to one another.I suspect your world view might have something to do with your virginity. If you have been holding your virginity on a pedstal at times and expect guys to clammer for it like a party prize their whole lives, I can tell you that won't happen. You need only look at a few posts her on DC to see there are plenty of 30 something virgins who are still alone and unhappy. If you want to stay a virgin till marriage, then why not marry one of these men who loves you? I'm just saying, don't expect Enrico Sauve to show up penniless on a white horse on a beach to deflower you just the way you like it...
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A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (29 January 2011):
 I completely agree with CaringGuy. The best indicator of a quality lasting relationship is good communication. Looks fade as do sex drives, so what's left after all that is gone? The bonds formed by communication.
Those guys you belittle here, I'm willing to bet they loved you. Loved you on a deeper level than the superficial assholes you seem to want now. I think you need to re-evaluate your priorities!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 January 2011): The grass is greener....You want a little danger/excitment aswell...
The things you want can actually come from you not by using decent men...yes we can all read....do you put your book down and stop reading romantic fairytales to jump on a two week vacation on your own or with friends...a new adventure...do you explore men without views of marriage? ....you talk ....we all do....but do you DO!!!!!!!instead of talk.
You don't need to use men to get the passionate thrill's your after... YOU just need to get adventurous yourself....it's the passion of life i think you need....actually walking bare footed in some far off sands...playing..meeting many men until one day.
If men say you have a good personality then use it don't ditch it for a shallow life, BY DISRESPECTING OTHERS.
far better to be able to wtite your own book of life.....than to be sat reading all the time...read somewhere new...instead of next door..
I wish you well...the colour of life :)
spunky monkey.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (29 January 2011):
I'm sorry to say this, but you've got it all upside down. You're not going to like me saying this, but you're coming across as a seriously deluded Drama Queen.
1 - You have men who actually like you for your personality, and you think that's BAD? That's not superficial - that's the deepest feeling a man will have for you. Loving someone's personality is the only thing that's not superficial. That is loving someone for who they are - that's as good as it comes.
2 - You want to have a man spend money on you? For what?
3 - You want to be able to treat a man like shit and have him still run around?
I'm sorry, but you're out of order. The reason you can't find the man you want is because no man would be insane enough to take you on. You're everything that is wrong! You want nothing but money, you don't care for men at all, you want to treat men like dirt and have them run around after you? Sorry, but the majority of us are simply not that stupid. No respectable man would ever take you on as someone the could love. You're far too shallow, too uncaring and too materialistic.
I'll tell you something though - you are the Domestic Abuser's Dream. So you need to be careful.
What a total waste of two decent men.
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