A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am 21 years old and i think of myself as a mature adult, i want to have that long term commitment with someone but my problem i have is that i become bored in a relationship very quickly.I am usually loud and very out going, and i enjoy the chase, as much as i say i don't, i guess deep down i like the chase, but that's only human nature we want what we cant have.Ive been with this girl for a few months now and we are really great together, but for the past week its like i have these sudden thoughts that maybe she isn't the one for me, and that im wasting her time. It all started after my first relationship i was with the person for over 2 years and that ended, then my next relationship was coming up to a year and started to get boring and i started looking for other people to flirt with because it was fun, then that ended and the next relationship after that went the same way.I really do care about her a whole lot, but i think i just see this relationship going to same way as all the rest, am i wasting her time? or should i tell her how i feel, because i really want to make this work with her.Why do i get bored so easily? Do i just enjoy the chase? Am i scared of commitment? Or am i still too young to know what it is i really want?
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female
reader, lovebird1  +, writes (6 April 2011):
Dear anonymous,I also think you are still quite young and if you're not into commitment yet, why force yourself. Maybe in time you'll find out how YOU can spice up a boring relationship.. it's not always the other persons' fault if it gets boring. If you want to stick with her, then get rid of the boredom. Try something new and fun. Take your girlfriend out to a new place, do something new together, and also do stuff with your friends that don't include her, so you'll miss her a little bit.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2011): This sounds exactly like me! I'm 22 and I ask myself those same questions all the time. I can't offer you any advice because I'd like to know the answer myself, but just wanted to let you know you're not the only one. :)
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice  +, writes (6 April 2011):
 I disagree,
Long term relationships don't "just happen".
You like the chase because you are hooked on the thrill.
If you want a long term relationship you better get committed in your mind. Make a careful choice, then stick to it with all you have.
FA
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A
male
reader, macdubh712 +, writes (6 April 2011):
You're 21. There's no reason to rush to be in a serious relationship. I think that is something that should just "happen." You cannot force that to just happen. Anyways, like I said, you're 21. Have fun and do you and don't pressure yourself to do something or be a certain way just because maybe other people are telling you that you should. You should decide what is best for you and do it. Just give your partner the courtesy of telling them how you feel and let them decide what is best for them. If the shoe fits, wear it. If not try on another one.
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