A
female
age
30-35,
*ritney1922
writes:I have been with the same amazing man for almost 18 months now and engaged for almost 16 of the months. We have a 6 month old daughter and just got our own place in a new state. We have been in this new house for almost 3 months, but we have been arguing so much lately and it's made him rethink our relationship and if we should even be together anymore. He says that he will always love and care about me wether we are together or not. However, I don't want to loose him or break up our family. We were supposed to get marrid this month. There is no way I would ever want to loose him over arguing. Things have been very stressful because he is the only one working. After our baby was born I didn't go back to work and he didn't want me to. After his work slowed down because it's winter he wants me to get a job. I have been trying but it's not as eas as he wants it to be. I am willing to do whatever it takes to make this work. I just don't know what else to do. How can we stop arguing and make this work?
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female
reader, Britney1922 +, writes (14 December 2010):
Britney1922 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe have sat down many times and talked and he still feels that we shouldn't be together right now. But yes I have someone to babysit her while I go to work. I keep trying to tell him that I want to work on this but he is just giving up and right before xmas with both of our families. Now we can not even have our first xmas as a family with our daughter. He is just letting go of everything and I don't want this to happen but I don't know what else to do. I have tried everything I can think of. I have bent over backwords and jumped through hoops tryna make this work. If there is anything else you can think of please let me know and to all those who tried to help already thank you so much.
A
male
reader, kenny  +, writes (13 December 2010):
 Hi, sorry to hear that you are having a tough time at the moment. Like Harleygirl say's you both need to sit down and talk this through. Is there a family member that can look after your baby while you go to work? Or maybe consider working from home, like maybe mail order,Ebay, or web design or something. I know it seems hard at the moment but i am sure things will all come good, just try focusing on a positive having outcome. Hope it goes well x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2010): i dont think you will lose him over arguing it only feels that way and if you have a new baby its not the time to be seperating just cause more stress to you both. Belive me I know in these tough economy times how hard it is to find a job. So dont stress just keep looking somthing is bound to show up. As far as the arguing its normal when your stressed about jobs and money and baby ect..to fight but if you realy love each other then you know it will pass let him know your doing you best to find one and if he sees anything thats hiring to let you konw it will make him feel better that you are trying...
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A
female
reader, Longhornfan81 +, writes (13 December 2010):
My question would be what are you arguing about? Sometimes, you can argue about senseless things for no reason. One of you could be experiencing the wedding jitters. Try to work through this esp. if you plan on getting married this month. THe first year of marriage is the hardest or so I have been told. Approach him and tell him how you feel and discuss the topics you argue about.
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A
male
reader, ljhenhmla +, writes (13 December 2010):
Maybe he feels unappreciated like he's doing everything ur not doing anything. This causes a lot arguments and stress. U both need to sid down and see how u both can help eachother out. Goodluck
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 December 2010): Hello there,
I suggest that when you are both not arguing, sit down with him and go through everything that is bothering both of you. Don't argue, raise voices or bring up old arguments - stick to the things you wish to discuss. Encourage him to be honest with you about the things that are bothering him, and don't interrupt when he is talking. He should let you do the same.
Once you have both aired your worries, work together to form a solution.
Hope this helps
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A
female
reader, harleygirl2010 +, writes (13 December 2010):
 Hi there, sorry to hear that. I guess what i would do was stop and sit down and talk about it. You know get ideas and feelings out into the open. If you had to get a job i would try looking at local day care centers that way you may be able to bring your daughter to work with you. I'm sorry i can't suggest more, but all i can think of is to sit down and talk. That usually is the best thing to do. I hope that things get better for you soon.
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