A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: How soon is too soon to get over someone? I *just* got out of my first serious relationship (and we almost made it to our 1 year anniversary). Right now I'm feeling hurt and confused, but I'm wondering how long is it okay to be mopey? And when is it time to pick yourself back up? I have a suspicion that he was cheating on me, since he never wanted to answer his phone when I called, and deleted me from his MySpace. We don't go to the same school, so this also adds on. Any advice would be greatly appreciated :)
View related questions:
anniversary, myspace Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, MonksDaBomb +, writes (11 September 2010):
tennisstar has the time frame about right - about a month or so I'd say. It DOES help a lot that the two of you are not going to the same school. My good friend that I eventually developed feelings for went to the same school as me, but thankfully we had graduated so it wasn't too awkward! It still took a while to get over though. If you're wondering what happened, he didn't view me in the same light as I saw him in.
Just some advice: some crying and sadness is fine, but after a while it can get unhealthy. Give yourself a few weeks to try to get over him, then try to distract yourself by getting into a new hobby, hanging out with girl friends, etc.
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (11 September 2010):
Oh geez when I was your age it took me a matter of 1-3 months to get over it, any longer then you're just giving him too much credit when he deserves none. Start the cleansing process delete his number, Facebook profile, MSN, any chat, take a box put in things he's left at your house or he's given you, then donate it to Goodwill, rip up or burn any pictures, the point is to erase him from your life like he never existed. It's a plus he goes to a different school, out of sight, out of mind. Trust me you will start to breathe better already. When you get older break-ups get easier, you get almost immune to them and then it's only a matter of minutes then you're over it.
...............................
A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael +, writes (11 September 2010):
There is no right answer to this. Take as long as you need to in order to get over him. Just don't dwell on him, tell yourself that it is time to move on and find someone who'll treat you well.
I hope that helps.
...............................
A
female
reader, LOSTasYOU +, writes (11 September 2010):
Well I want to start off by saying im sorry that you are going through such a tough time. I personally know how it feels to be heartbroken, confused, hurt and lost all at the same time. Its ok to feel this way. You just got off of your first serious relationship and we tend to stick to that first person the most. So to answer your question, its ok to feel bad but its not ok to let this take over the best of you. As much as it hurts, honey just think of it as he wasn't meant for YOU instead of you weren't meant for HIM. Especially if you even have the thought that he might've been cheating in the first place. Think on he bright side...it ended before it could've gotten worse. Just be strong and hang in there. Worry about making yourself happy! HOPE~THIS~HELPS!!!
...............................
|