A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I recently met this guy whose family was from my hometown originally but he was born and raised in this country. He obviously likes me a lot and we had a lot to talk as his major is similar to mine. We've met twice but nothing was awkward and he seems like a very honest guy. To my surprise he also has plans to move back to my (our) home city although I never mentioned my plans-this is something I always worried about when I dated here. But the problem is...he's 10 years older than me and I'm honestly not attracted physically! He looks quite old with plenty of wrinkles all over his face, and he had bad teeth.If he's younger or look better I'll have no doubt at all to keep seeing him as he's very keen to see me but also respect me a lot. Of course I didn't say I wasn't physically attracted to him, I simply said that I "warmed up" slowly but wanted to see him again.Now with his face in my head I just...I know it's very likely that he'd treat me well and we'd have a lot to talk about as a couple, but...I know appearance is not everything, but I'm so worried I'd regret later if I'm not getting more involved. Opinions? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Basschick  +, writes (6 April 2011):
 Never marry simply for security and being treated nice. You will long for a man who turns you on, and it'll be much more painful later. Keep him as a friend if you wish, but do not make a committment to this man. It would be a big mistake. Good luck.
A
male
reader, honestman  +, writes (6 April 2011):
Whatever decision you take, it is the right one.For males, appearance is very important. But in case of woman, not everything is about looks. For some of them, how they feel when they are around this guy would be more important.I would say that you follow your heart in this one. Remember that dating is like gambling. You really never know what you are going to get [this seems like a forest gum quote]. You should take some risks. I'm sure that you'll meet handsome guys that treat you like crap, and not so handsome guys who treat you like princess. Finding someone in the middle could be hard though.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2011): I have always felt that appearances are to land that first impression or to attract someone towards you. After a while , all that matters is the personality. If it is love able then no matter how bad the person looks, you will not care. If it is something that you don't like then you wont care how good the person looks, you will not love them.
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A
male
reader, joshua.james  +, writes (6 April 2011):
i'm a man so im sure its different for me but i would find it extremely hard to have a relationship with someone i'm not at all attracted to. but everyone is different so its your opinion that matters
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A
female
reader, Yetilicious +, writes (6 April 2011):
 Well honestly, I'm not sure how a relationship can work if you're not attracted to them physically. You're going to be looking at that face a lot you know. Looks aren't everything at all, but if you don't feel like kissing him at the end of your date, or you don't feel like cuddling up with him and snuggling into his neck...what's the point? You both deserve better. Remain friends if you want, but find someone who you are attracted to AND who has all the qualities you are looking for, in the meantime this guy can find a woman who likes the way he looks AND his personality. I hope everything works out, let us know what happens!
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