A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I have an acquaintance who is a few centimeters from being 6 feet tall and he believes he is short and worthless because of it. He brought up a lot of articles and facts about how being short is the worst thing a guy can be and that being 6 feet tall and above is the greatest thing ever and sliced bread was just the flavor of the month. I am 1.63m so I don't know how I am supposed to be felling about it. I am very far from being tall. Before he came along I knew I was short I just didn't know that it was a borderline handicap in life. All the things I have read on the internet and seen in the media don't help my already low self esteem and they just reaffirm what the guy told me and make me sad. I gave up on girls a long time ago for different reasons but I don't like the fact that they won't respect me or see me as a real man just because I am not physically impressive. How important is a mans height in society and what are short guys supposed to do in order to be respected if they are underestimated and sidelined because of their height?
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male
reader, Serpico +, writes (14 February 2013):
Im 6ft tall. Im kinda glad Im not that much taller - my finacee is 5ft and it would make kissing her all the more difficult.....
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2013): When I was very young I was blessed to not be afraid of the dark. Then, some grownups (a cousin, an aunt and my parents) told me all about the 'monsters' under my bed and how I should be afraid of the dark.More than 20 years later, I'm a grown adult and I am just starting to get over this irrational fear. I shouldn't be afraid...really it is silly...i KNOW this!You've lived your life up until very recently completely unaware that 'short' men have problems that tall men don't seem to have. Just like I've never seen a monster under my bed, you have NEVER seen people treat you differently because of your height. Just because the media says something is true does not mean it is true for you and your life's circumstances. As long as you live your life with the confidence of a 'tall' man...the same confidence you had before someone dragged you down to their level--misery loves company after all--you will enjoy all of the perks of a tall man.So far, life has treated you like a man. Don't waste any more time entertaining negative thoughts terrified of what could be under your bed. Stand tall, be confident, be yourself! It has worked for you for this long.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (13 February 2013):
But they aren't disrespected or underestimate or sidelined socially , because of their height!
The French ex- President Sarkozy is very short . The Italian ex Prime Minister Berlusconi ( who's also one of the richest guys in the world ) is very short too. I could send you a list as long as my arm of short politicians,industry tycoons,milionnaires, Nobel prizes, show business personalities, VIPs in general.
What you mean, is that shorter guys may be perceived in our culture as physically less attractive. Less apt to inspire lust . Which sucks, - but what lust has got to do with respect and a place in society ?
Yeah, probably you'll have to sweat it a little bit more than your tall friends to find dates . Same, as Fatherly Advice notices, as it happens to overweight girls.
It is what it is, not everybody is born Brad Pitt. - and luckily, it won't mess up your life. Shortness it is a " less preferred " or " less popular " quality, not a curse or a tragedy, unless you make it such. As proven by the zillions of short guys who have gfs, wives, kids, and a
normal sexual and romantic life all over the world.
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (13 February 2013):
Being a short man is very similar to being an overweight woman. There is a certain percentage of the population that will not find you attractive. Too bad there isn't a diet / exercise that can make you taller.
I think that women tend to be more flexible in changing their attitude than men so that is the bright side. I'm sorry that you have given up on girls. You are just 3 cm shorter than me and I feel I've done okay.
FA
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A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (13 February 2013):
i don't know where you're from, but my GOD, you must live in the land of giants.if you do a little google research, you'll discover that the universal average male hight is about 5 foot 8 inches. not even close to 6 feet. the only 2 countries in the world where the average male height is over 6 feet (which it was only by like, a centimeter) is the netherlands and somewhere in the alps. so i kinda get the feeling you're beating yourself up over nothing.being tall doesn't equate to anything. but if you already get it in your head that you're inferior to other men, i'll tell ya what, that certainly will show. and THAT may affect your chances with women.yes, some taller men may naturally attract a lot of women. i suppose some women have some innate, evolutionary drive to want the biggest and tallest man to "protect her" from god knows whatever it is they are supposed to be protecting her from in this day and age. so sure, they probably get a lot of women. but i also have known a lot of men who are 5'8 who have so much game, they have to fight the women off with sticks. they get just as much, if not more, female attention as the really tall dudes.don't get so hung up on height. the more you start to feel down about yourself, the more it'll reflect in how you act. and nobdody likes a debbie downer. confidence goes a long way. and i'm sure you're the average height for where ever it is that you live. so just relax.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2013): Anything can be a handicap if you choose to see it that way.I'm a 5'-10" woman. I have a 5'-5" boss who condescends me all the time...or just pointedly refuses to look at me in the eye when we speak. I find he's a lot more personable towards shorter people. This is the second job where I've had shorter men shunt or ignore me.Should I claim my height as a handicap? Or my gender? If I did either, I probably wouldn't get out of bed in the morning. I just accept that it's their problem, I try to do my job well, and I get on with my life.I have a boyfriend who is probably 3(?) inches shorter than me. Sometimes people stare or mutual friends tease us, but I don't care...I adore him.At a certain point, you just have to accept you're not responsible for the way the world is built and once you can do that, you set yourself free from its expectations.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (13 February 2013):
If he thinks he is worthless because of his height, he has some issues that you are not going to be able to solve for him.
He is suffering from irrational thinking and low self-esteem.
It sounds as though you are too.
I have some good friends who are considered short by society's yardstick. They are married and successful and learned and fun. They have chosen their own yardstick as measures of their self worth.
How important is height in today's society? Exactly as important as you allow it.
What are short guys supposed to do? Live your life, decide what you want to do and do it.
Men and women are underestimated by other men and women for all sorts of reasons. Ignore the underestimators and get on with your life.
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A
female
reader, ihavetoomanythoughts +, writes (13 February 2013):
I think height is nowhere near as important as how you hold yourself. I see some tall people out there but they don't walk confidently or they just slouch, which makes them seem shorter then they actually are. And then I see some short people out there who are just impressive. The thing is, if you are comfortable with how you are and you have good self esteem, then you are more likely to project a sense of confidence which is what gets you places :) So ignore your friend who is doomed to be short because he believes he is short and that is reflected by his behaviour which is detected by everyone else, and just know that you are just the right height.
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A
female
reader, Dear Mandy +, writes (13 February 2013):
HI
there is an old saying " all good things come in small packages" height has nothing to do with respect or anything else for that matter it's down to the circle of friends you keep. My best friend is just under 4ft I have never treated her any different than I do everyone else, I also have a male friend who is 4 ft 1 again not treated any different, there are just some shallow people out there in this world that have the media rule their lives. Got to look this way or that way, just being yourself and happy is what makes everyone around you respect you more and want to know more about you. Some women may find it hard because many like to wear heels, so if dating a guy that is short or shorter than her she would feel obligated to not wearing them, some may find it impowering being taller, the list goes on because everyone is different. This freind can't be such a great friend if his making your feel the way you do, so maybe a change of friends is what you need? you are the same height as me , I think it's a great height not to big not to small just right :D
Mandy x
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (13 February 2013):
the average man is 5'8"
I heard 6'2" is 4.6% of the population... (it was on CBS sunday morning just last weekend)
my hubby is about 5'7 or just under and he's perfect for me.
many of the men I work with are well under 6 feet tall and very powerful men...
height does not command respect. presence and bearing command respect. authority and confidence command respect.
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