A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello, I have a very weird question. I have been with my man for a few years, in what I thought was a monogamous relationship. I got a checkup a while back, and they said I had chlamydia. They also said that chlamydia can only be spread through oral, anal, or vaginal sex. I have had sex with no on else, and had regularly been checked for STDs before I met him. He says that since chlamydia is a bacteria it just "formed" and that he did not cheat on me. Can chlamydia just "happen" in a monogamous relationship? Doesn't one of the people have to have had oral, anal, or vafinal sex?!! HELP! I can't find any answers to this question online, and I am too embarrassed to ask my doctor!
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2011): I have a another question to add.I know that everyone is saying that it doesn't just form, but if's that's the case, how did the person who they got it from get it from. Meaning that at one point in time two people who didn't have it formed it,so is it possible for two people now who don't have it to form it? I was tested while pregnant and didn't have it well two weeks later I had it and I know I didn't cheat and I know that my boyfriend cheat.He was home everyday on time and with his job there is no way that he can get away long enought to cheat and he only works with men so I would think he didn't get it from anybody at work.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2009): I had an ex-fiance who went away for a weekend and a week later she got Chlamydia. The first things was falling back on me because I am the man and I would definetly cheat on her lol. That's not the case I had no sexual partners at the time being and even after we broke it off. The thing which irritates me is I get the same stupid answers "It had to of layed dormant in my system for a whole year or it could have in your system." I don't believe that the first thing out of my doctor's mouth was "She has been unfaithfaul or you were." I know I wasn't because I never went away. I was at home studying my ass off to become the man I am today which is a business man. I just want so clarity. Did she or didnt she?
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reader, j9997  +, writes (14 August 2008):
Chlamydia can only be transmitted through intimate sexual contact (and not by shaking hands or sharing a bath with someone who's infected, etc.)
So if you have had no sexual partners other than your boyfriend then he will have infected you. However, if you have had sexual partners BEFORE your boyfriend then one of them could have infected you.
It is unlikely that the test you took provided an inaccurate result but there are lots of other places where you can buy tests like http://www.firsttesting.com/chlamydia-tests.htm
It sounds like your man is trying to pull the wool over your eyes. I'm sorry to have to tell you that. But you probably know the truth anyway.
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reader, Danielepew  +, writes (1 August 2008):
 Well, dear poster, then you have your answer. He cheated on you. There's no question about it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2008): Hey guys, this is good ol' chlamydia girl. Yes, I was tested prior to becoming involved in this relationship because I was secually active before him. I was also tested numerous times while we were together because we became pregnant. None of the tests showed positive. I have also been treated! Thank you all for the help, I don't believe that chlamydia just "forms" either. I have had medical training and have never heard such. I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt because he SWORE that the nurse told him this when I hauled his ass to the clinic to be treated. Lying asshole, huh? Yeah, but I think I knew that! Thanks for a little confirmation, it's nice to have people who agree with me!
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reader, lexilou +, writes (1 August 2008):
 Before you jump to conclusion ask your doctor. It sounds to me as though you havent been checked since you were with him, he could easiy have had it without knowing and is probably embarrassed. He needs to be treated too otherwise you will just be bouncing the infection back and forth to each other. x
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reader, Danielepew +, writes (1 August 2008):
I did a little internet search and found the obvious: chlamydia is spread from person to person. So, yes, he got it from someone else. The question here is when.
Not that I'm defending your boyfriend, but some people get infected and never receive treatment because they don't have any symptoms. Like yourself, dear poster. You knew you had it because it came up in a regular checkup. Chlamydia is more of a serious problem precisely because it is very damaging and often "silent".
I couldn't find what the "incubation period" is. All I could find is that the Centers for Disease Control suggest that infected persons notify all sexual partners of the previous sixty days. I don't think this means the disease can't be passed to another person for a longer period; it means that they are unaware of when you got it, so they suggest you tell all this people.
Maybe he cheated on you, maybe he didn't. I'm sorry, but, unless you never had contact with anybody else before, you may have also got it from someone else.
Another way to determine when you got the disease would be to know when your last checkup took place. If you didn't have the disease then, you know approximately when you got infected.
I understand your embarrassment, but a trained doctor (and a decent human being) will be able to answer your questions and, more importantly, to treat the disease.
The good news is, chlamydia is easy to treat. I hope you find these links useful:
http://www.cdc.gov/std/Chlamydia/STDFact-Chlamydia.htm#WhatIs
http://www.womenshealth.gov/faq/stdchlam.htm#2
http://www.medicinenet.com/chlamydia_in_women/page2.htm#1whatis
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reader, Collaroy  +, writes (1 August 2008):
 Sorry mate, but you have to accept that your lovely boyfriend is a cheating rat.
Dump him, and move on with your life. This is your only choice.
sorry.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2008): Ummmm ... yeah. Bacteria are tiny little living things. They don't just "form" from nothing. I mean, if they did, that would be pretty spectacular - you could definitely win some major science awards. Think about it. Your coochie spontaneously generated life from non-life.Are you kidding?I could maybe buy the argument as misguided but understandable if you were talking about something like mold (which actually travels through the air in tiny microscopic spores or is insipidly present in the food itself, and then, given the opportunity, will grow from non-visible to a large enough colony to be visible to the naked eye). But even mold doesn't just spontaneously generate. It comes from somewhere. And chlamydia happens to be a bacteria that doesn't live well outside of the body, which is why it's transmissible only by direct contact (not airborne, and you don't pick it up weeks later from an old toilet seat).Your bf is full of shit. He cheated on you, he gave you an std, and now he's lying to your face to cover it.I am so, so sorry. Honestly, I can only imagine what it must feel like to face this realization. All I can say is that I honestly believe you are a strong enough person to get through this, and that you will be better for it in the end. I had a bf who cheated on me once, and when I found out, I was absolutely devastated. I felt so ashamed, and then I felt angry with myself, b/c rationally I knew that he was the one who had done something wrong, but still, I felt like somehow it was reflective of me. Like I was somehow unworthy or defective or ... I don't know. There wasn't really a lot of reason to it, which is what helped me to move past it after a while, but I definitely did. I felt humiliated - it was such a blow to my pride that I had been played. All this to say, if you're willing to accept the fact that this story is absurd and there's only one explanation for how you got the clap, I'm sure there are some really loaded emotions waiting for you beyond that. And I'm sorry that you're about to have to face that. I wish you all the best.
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reader, littlesuziepie +, writes (1 August 2008):
 I am no doctor and so I can't say for surep0i wouldn't think you can just develope a std on your own or it wouldn't be called a sexually transmitted disease. Right? I think just some logical thinking can answer that question. But you never really know unless you hear it from a medical professional. So ask a doctor sooner than later. If you did get it from him then break it off with him quick. If he is cheating and then making you think it just developed then he takes you for an idiot. He thinks he can just lie to you like that and you will believe him. What a jerk.
But if it did just come about then you should be fine in your relationship.
Ask a doctor that's about the best thing I can tell you.
Good luck!
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2008): Your boyfriend is full of shit. Chlamydia doesn't just spontaneously appear. It is transmitted through - and only through - "sexual contact with an infected person. Chlamydia can be passed during vaginal, anal, or oral sex." Either he had it previously and just didn't know it (sometimes there are no symptoms) or he been screwing around on you. I'd guess the latter, personally - the fact he lied to you about how it's contracted makes me wonder what else he's lying about...
Plus, surely if he'd been previously infected, he would have found out when you both got tested for STIs prior to becoming sexually active (you did both get tested, right? I assume you've been having unprotected sex with him...). Maybe he tested positive and didn't tell you or lied about it?
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2008): honey you can call a doc ter at a diff hospital and ask a question or go to a health center. I have heard that before what ur boyfriend has told u but thats just hear say hear say ya know but there is ways u can find out google it up but make sure if u did get it from him u kick his ass 2 the curb,girl dont put up with that crap i had 2 b4 and it was a waste of 4 years!so just be carful with ur heart. Sorry i wasnt much help.good luck best luck!
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