A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am seeing a man from Africa. I don't know how he feels about me nowadays.Nor if he loves me. We only see each other once a week. I am american and am used to a lot of attention when I am in a romantic relationship. He works and goes to school full time learning and english is his third language. He is so kind, so wish I could shake off this feeling that he does not love me. Don't know how to proceed. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (1 December 2012):
 Sure he could- never say never - but we can't say that just based on the few infos you gave us.
Is he a legal immigrant, does he need a Green Card ? Is there a big difference in your incomes and earning potential ? Is he in the USA to stay, or just transient ? Is there a big age difference between you ? Are you positive that he is single and has got no wife and kids back home ?... and so on and so forth.
Another good question would be, is he well integrated socially, has he got friends etc.., or is he very lonely ?
Because, without unnecessarily suspecting him of anything wrong, a new immigrant may have his access to sex and companionship severely limited by his imperfect knowledge of local language, customes and mentality, .. and feel he has to make do with what he can get .
I hope I don't sound xenophobic, it wouold be ironic because I actually seldom dated people from my own country, I prefer foreigners I guess, the differences in culture and mentality make things more interesting.
All I'm saying, one should always enter into relationships with open eyes- and , with someone whose whole life and past is in another continent, maybe even a tad more open.
A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (1 December 2012):
 How long have you been together?
Where did you meet him?
How long has he been in the US?
How old is he?
When you first met was he loving and attentive?
More detail needed.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2012): Sounds like you're just not used to being with a guy who has responsibilities to me.
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