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How do I prove my innocence?

Tagged as: Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (23 June 2010) 5 Answers - (Newest, 23 June 2010)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

How can i prove that i am 100% innocent and am telling the truth to my boyfriend? I stupidly lied to my boyfriend of almost 3 years in a panic because i thought that he would think there was something going on between someone else when there wasn't. He gets mad easily and doesn't like me to have friends that are guys or even talk to guys. (even before this whole thing happened) A kid that i'm not friends with or even talk to started to write his name on my arm while in class while i was turned around and i asked him to stop but i didnt flip out or anything like my boyfriend says i should have. I didn't take it as flirting or anything especially since i don't talk to the kid and because the situation wasn't like that. but anyway my boyfriend saw his unfinished name because it had happened so quickly and i had forgotten about it. immediately i freaked out and thought omg my boyfriend will think i did something wrong so i lied about it at first mistakenly. i told him everything that really happened and how it was stupid and over it a second. i can see how easy it is to think something when on because i lied about it but it 100% honestly did that and everyone knows i wouldn't but he still doesn't believe me. i am so in love with my boyfriend and would do anything for him and would never ever cheat on him or anything like that. how can i really show him its completely the truth?

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (23 June 2010):

You've already told him the truth. You no longer are required to prove anything. So tell him once more very clearly one more time that you've done nothing. After that, if he continues to act this way, dump him. He sounds very unstable to me, and I'm not sure you shuold be with him anyway.

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A female reader, YouWish United States +, writes (23 June 2010):

YouWish agony auntTell your boyfriend to put a sock in it. You don't need to apologize for his immature and jealous nature. Tell him that if he keeps it up, he WILL lose you.

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A female reader, sunnycomet Canada +, writes (23 June 2010):

sunnycomet agony auntWow....sounds like your bf is unstable...does not trust you...and is controling you.

My advice is to confront him...tell him you don't know the kid and it was nothing. You lied because you were scared of what he would think. Tell him in a confident voice and if he doesn't believe you then is he really worth all of this? Does he make you happy? Are you happy?

I would reconsider your relationship with him.

Good Luck! Keep us updated!

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A female reader, janniepeg Canada +, writes (23 June 2010):

janniepeg agony auntThis is not a big issue as much as your boyfriend makes it to be. There is nothing to be mad about, and there is nothing to prove. Just think about the future, anytime you have contact with a guy, work with a guy, you would be questioned 100 times a day what you did. The whole focus of the relationship would be on explaining, defending and proving yourself. You would be so annoyed that you just want to stay home all day, and then he would ask you who you chatted with online. It doesn't look like fun to me.

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A female reader, Spades Canada +, writes (23 June 2010):

Spades agony auntHow old are you?

You have already been honest with him, telling him what actually happend, you have people that can vouche for you..It's up to him at this point. You've done all you can do. If he is going to get all up in arms about some kid writing his name on your arm, I would seriously reconsider that relationship.

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