A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: hi everyone! im in a relationship with a 30yr old guy,im 25. At my age right now i want a serious relationship, making a commitment hoping that it will lead to a great future. the thing is my bf of a yr havent mention anything about marriage yet. however, i know its sounds strange for me to ask why, coz in the first place i knew that we've not been with each other that long. my concern in here is that how will i know that he too has these plans like mine? how will i ask him in a manner that is not pressuring him? is there any way? what im trying to point out is how will i know if he sees me as a great partner for the future coz i just dont want to waste my time with him if in his case he cant see any future with me. please help!!!!!!! Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, nologo +, writes (6 July 2007):
Okay, so you want a serious relationship.This is good that you know what you want.You have been a year with your boyfriend already and I think that you have the right to initiate conversation about future."how will i ask him in a manner that is not pressuring him?"It will pressure him regardless of how you ask, but you need to ask him anyway to find out what you can expect from him.
A
female
reader, Veasse +, writes (4 July 2007):
As you rightly say its has only been a year, firstly you need to understand him and his past relationships.
If he has been in serious relationships before he may have been hurt and be afraid to commit o something for the future.
If your relationship is serious and you both love each other you should be able to sit down and discuss it.
Just ask simple questions, that dont lead to too much anxiety.
Ask him if he would like to talk about the future?
If he says no then dont force it.
Give it time... tell him how you feel and that you need reassurance that you both want the same thing in the long run!
good luck
veasse x
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