| A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Dear cupid,I need some advice. I'm 21 years old, law student, and mature for my age, I've always been. Like a few years ago, a young litigator move into house next to mine and since then, I've got a huge crush on him. He works with my father who is a lawyer so I see him in fathers office sometimes. Recently he broke up with his girlfriend for 3 years and that kinda makes me happy, I know it's stupid, but still. The thing is, he is like 10 years older than me, and I don't know what to do to impress him. I already started to study hard so I could be well educated and interesting on that level but since i look younger than I actually am, I don't know how to get his attention physically. I mean, I don't find it very polite to dress up in heels or put on lots of make up and so on in order to look older.
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broke up, crush, look older Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (7 March 2013):
 This is a common scenario. I’m going to say that often we think we are mature for our age and in reality we are not. I find that folks that say that in this sort of a situation are trying to come up with reasons why what they want is an ok thing.
You don’t need reasons. Once folks are over 18 and legal, age is not a huge issue for me. and ten years… that’s NOTHING, especially if the guy is the older partner.
The issues are this… you have known him (and he you) for a few years so probably since you were a teen and maybe not even a legal teen…. And he works with your dad and he’s a neighbor. And he’s had a long term girlfriend.
The fact that you even say you are happy about him breaking up with is gf belies your statement that you are mature for your age btw. That’s actually a fairly childish and immature selfish view here. He just broke up with a long term gf and even if he initiated the breakup it’s painful and hard and he needs to recover and heal.
You want to “impress” him. At least you think you do. In reality you just want him to notice you as an adult and a viable girlfriend option. I doubt this is going to happen.
If you want this to work, you have to BE YOURSELF. NO GAME playing. No trying to impress him. Because to be honest if you are anything other than yourself, then the person he sees is not the real you and once you get his attention you will want to be yourself and then he will say “well she wasn’t like this when we first met”. Being something you are not to get his attention is false advertising and it’s called “bait and switch” in the sales world. It’s illegal there.
The issue is, he’s more of your dad’s friend/contemporary and you probably are slotted as the cute kid next door.
A
male
reader, hardnut +, writes (5 March 2013):
my wife is almost 10 year younger than I. been with her 23 years and have 2 teen children. I would not have ask her out due ot age span. I did think she was hot looking, but did not want to look like a pervert. Her brother ask me ot take her out. Her parents also ask and told me it was fine.
So I would say you need to be your self now and always. Do not try to act older. He will see the fake or put on actions. Tell him you are open for dinner and or date.
Let him take it from there.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 March 2013): Yeah, he is always super friendly with me, makes long eye contact which make me feel kinda weird since he was in a relationship and all, he also shows interest about what I'm talking/doing/and so on.
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A
male
reader, Glacier  +, writes (5 March 2013):
Well, you're not yet another random young chick but actually a well educated one.
Since you guys are in the same line of field I'd figure it would not be hard to strike up a conversation with him. Have you already talked to him?
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (5 March 2013):
 The age difference and the fact that he works for your father doesn't bode well for you I'm afraid. Has he shown any kind of interest in you?
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