A
male
age
30-35,
*47
writes:As much as I try, when I meet new people have trouble making small talk. Part of it also relates to my confidence (nearly non-existent).What are some good topics that don't make me look overly friendly? And how do I generally improve my confidence and social skills, I've been living on the web for too long. Please help!
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2008): Read the daily newspaper for a start.
A
female
reader, lexilou  +, writes (11 May 2008):
 Try making small talk at the till when you go shopping and build up your confidence slowly. As boring as it sounds talk about the weather or a recent news story. If they dont respond always dont take it personally as not everyone wants to chat to strangers but some are bored and love the chance for a good chat - pick an older lady rather than a young girl or guy as they will often chat more openly and this will help you build up your skills. Dont go into too many personal details as that can be a bit scary but just make general chit chat - even about the price of eggs if youre in the supermarket!! Good luck x
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A
female
reader, stuckinthemiddle81  +, writes (11 May 2008):
 Making small talk didn't come easy to me either up until a couple years ago. I guess you could say I was a bit "anti-social" because I was always on the computer, I didn't have many friends and I thought all people were stupid (I went through my "teen angst" years late). BUT-I found out that by just saying something simple as "This weather sucks", others may reply with their own opinion and thus the conversation continues and goes onto something else. Sometimes, when you try to get a small talk convo going, it doesn't work because a) the person's an uptight douche who doesn't like to talk to strangers (like my Dad) or b)there is no "b".
Now for your confidence, you NEED that to make an impression. I find that when I'm not feeling my most confident, it shows and I'm a downer when that happens. I am sure that you are an extremely interesting person! You said you've been on the web too long--then talk about something interesting or weird you learned on Youtube or some role playing game or a science article you read recently--or last year! The hardest part of small talk is the first impression, after that, you're on easy street. Practice makes perfect. Keep yourself mingling at parties, get togethers, dates, etc. The more people you talk to, the better practice you have at talking and inventing your personality on a broader level. You'll get use to it. I believe in you! Good luck! And don't worry! =-)
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A
female
reader, doniar +, writes (11 May 2008):
go talk make converstations smile to people faces they will come to you and talk.. be nice not too sweet confident because there no reason you shouldn't go talk to people make jokes dress to impress :) girls will want to talk to you.. make sure your appearence is looking good iam not saying looks is what going to make you popular but everyones beautiful in my eyes but how you take care of yourself is what going to build you up and dats what going to make girls wanna be friends with you and guys crazy about you.. then your personality be fun talk laugh enjoy yourself and you ll be happy and your self esteem will build up. I came from a complete different country... i was new to states everything was different but i did what was above and thank god iam happy for who iam email me if you want to talk :)
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