A
male
age
30-35,
* ball
writes:Well, i have a friend who met this girl about a year ago. When he met her she had a boyfriend but he was only trying to be her friend at first but then he started liking her. They ended up getting really close and the girl started liking him as well. When the girls boyfriend moved out of state her and my best friend got very close they started falling for each other doing sexual things together but then out of know were the girl left him because she said that she had realized that she loved her boyfriend but..... everybody knew her boyfriend was cheating on her and when she left my best friend to go back to her boyfriend it wasnt long before her boyfriend left her for another girl. After her boyfriend left her she came crawling back to my best friend saying she was stupid and hurt and she wanted him back, which i think was his first mistake because he took her back. but they ended up starting a relationship of there own when this guy named "Jason" came along... you see my best friends girlfriend is in college and she met "Jason" there. while her and my best friend were still together she started getting really close to "Jason". he took her to the mall and shopping and out to eat and they were basically doing what you would do in a relationship. so my best friend told her he wasnt comfortable with his girlfriend doing all of those things with "Jason" and she replied with "well im just so confused right now i think we need some time off" so her and my best friend took a break but while they were not together she was still seeing "Jason". so about two days ago she started acting weird and my friend called her friends and asked what was going on and they told him that she had sex with "Jason" so my friend told her he didnt want to see her again ect... but she does the same thing she did the first time... she calls and cries and apologizes about what she did and he says he never seen her like that before so he is considering letting her back into his life but in my opinion he shouldnt do that but he really loves her so does anybody know what he should do . But in my opinion he should let her go because i believe he wont find the girl that deserves him until her let the one that doesn't go....
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female
reader, sappygirl +, writes (20 October 2009):
 love is blind and your BF loves this girl. He doesn't want to let her go because he cares deeply for this girl.
From outside looking in, it's obvious that this girl is using him as a safety net. She doesn't want to be alone and knows that your BF will always be there for her.
Of course we know that she will never be the right girl for him because she is selfish in her needs.
but in order for your friend to see the truth, he has to make a conscious decision to know that he deserves better than her and go after it.
Right now, he knows, but feelings get in the way and we all have been weak at one point in our lives.
He is young and will realize soon enough.
Just urge him and make sure he practices safe sex so that he is not tied to this girl for life.
For him to see the whole picture, no convincing will do the trick. He has to see or experience it himself through a bird's eye view.(meaning a different perspective) and right now, he can only see his own view.
Which is one of love for this girl.
He'll find out when she breaks his heart enough times.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (20 October 2009):
I'm afraid I agree with post below. You could wanrn him once more, very directly and firmly. If he still doesn't listen, let him find out for himself.
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A
female
reader, Sammycake +, writes (20 October 2009):
 You need to let him find out the hard way, I'm afraid. Some people are just blind until they have something that really punches them in the face.
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