A
female
age
,
*aryB
writes:What are the chances that my ex fiance's new relationship will survive? He left me after 7 yrs. 5 mths. ago and became engaged to her after only 3 mths. I know it seems like they were seeing each other before he left me but, that is not the case. I'm sure he had his eye on her before but, did not get involved with her until after. How can he possibly know someone well enough in such a short time to become engaged to them. He was professing his undying love to her 2 wks. after ending it with me but, never even let on to her that he was just out of a long-term relationship and engaged to marry me (we were planning on marrying July 4th. weekend but, he ended it 3 wks. before) Apparently, it didn't matter much to her that he has been not only dishonest to me but, her also because she agreed to marry him. How could she trust someone who lied to her from the get go? I know that I need to move on but, I can't seem to get past the fact that he has left me in devestation and is quickly and happily moving on with someone else. I have read that rebound relationships rarely last but, they seem to be moving right along. It makes me feel like those 7 yrs. I spent loving him and planning for our future have been nothing but a lie! Yes, we had our ups and downs but, when it came right down to it we were very loving and affectionate to one another-best friends. Could I have been that blind all those yrs. and how could he keep up the farse for that long if that were the case? How can he kiss and make love to someone else just like that after being with someone for so long- when I think of being with someone else, it makes me ill to my stomach. I guess, what I am really asking is for someone to help me make sence of all this. Your thoughts and insight would be appreciated.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Red591 +, writes (17 September 2011):
 BTW read my answer below: The ex that left me didn't last 4 months with the 19 year old.He is now broke and clinging onto some other girl. The 19 year got too immature and he quicly dumped her for another. I still wait for the day that I hear he has been dumped by someone but has not happened yet.I also hear he knows he ruined everything and his life from mutual friends. He is going after her so fast taht he doesn't have time to know if he loves her or not. When he finds out, they will be married. That is not the time to find out if you are compatable with someone so not to worry. that won't work
A
female
reader, MaryB +, writes (25 September 2010):
MaryB is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI appreciate both male & female responses- I have to agree with both that I have my doubts they will work out & I'm not just saying so because I wish it to be! You are right, my ex is a very insecure person with very low self esteem. He would always make comments that he was not good enough for me & I would end up having to build him up but, I did so because I always saw the good in him way down deep & loved him for it. This girl is a few yrs. younger than him & quite the ego trip for him I'm sure- I also, feared that she would be able to give him the one thing I couldn't- a child of his own due to the fact that I'm past child bearing yrs. where she isn't but, chances are she will not be able to accomplish that either since she has some serious medical issues- another thing my ex has apparently not put a whole lot of thought into. My ex moved way too fast & made promises to her right off the bat & now feels he has no other choice but, to follow through. They have not set a date yet, only sometime in the fall of next yr.- lets see if they make it that far.His friends seem to think he is in it for the money - she has a pretty well paying job & if that is the case that is pretty sad in my opinion. They have also, stated she is quite naive & extremely needy. Maybe they deserve each other!
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A
female
reader, Red591 +, writes (24 September 2010):
That crap won't work out. He is moving waaaay too fast and that is a huge red flag. He is doing everything in the honey moon phase and that means he will be divorcing one day and probably with a kid if she pulls the "oopse I'm pregnant thing" to seal the deal. I bet he ends up miserable. My ex just left me after a similar situation for a 19 year old that he seems enthralled with. He will be sorry one day and so will your ex. WHen he tries to talk to you, tell him to F*%K off lol
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2010): This seems to be a common scenario for some (very insecure) guys. Sounds like a major rebound, and he's trying to "normalize" things by marrying her. Odds are very high this is NOT going to work, but it may take a year or two to fall apart. Don't wait till it does, get on with living a great life.
Remember, the best revenge is living well! Go do it!
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