A
female
age
30-35,
*onesy99
writes:Hi. I'm a 15 year old girl. My boyfriend is 17. I've known him since I was 2 months old, and we fell in love when we were just little kids. We've been going steady for about 2 months now, and I feel that I'm completely ready to lose my virginity to him. I'm not on birth control, but I've taken health classes for 6 years and I'm pretty sure I know how to prevent pregnancy.My question is.. How can I tell if my virgin boyfriend is ready??P.S. Our parents are hoping that we get married in a few short years.. if that changes anything?
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female
reader, YummyMummy  +, writes (27 June 2007):
 Talk to your boyfriend about it. Explain that you feel ready for sex and see what he says. He may be, then again he might not be.
xxxxxxx
A
female
reader, jonesy99 +, writes (5 February 2007):
jonesy99 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you all for the great advice. It sounds as if you're all saying the same thing.. So I guess I can wait a couple years, when we're married. Hope to hear from all of you again!
3JJ
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (5 February 2007):
 All I have to say on this one is that you'll just know.
If he isn't showing that he's ready, then he's not. You'll know what he is. Why rush things along? Oh, and even though you've taken health class (which is fabulous), you still ought to check out getting some birth control before you start having sex. Birth control is a marvelous thing. Pulling out DOESN'T work. Just throwing that in there.
Don't rush him. If you two are going to spend the rest of your lives together, then you have the rest of your lives to be having sex. So what's the big hurry? Wait for a few months... get comfortable with each other. Have fun kissing and stuff. Once you start having sex, the makeout sessions aren't as fun anymore.
Enjoy each other until you're sixteen. Enjoy being young and with each other.
xxIndia
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2007): In a loving relationship there is no rush to pop each other's cherry, especially if you know he will be the one to take you out of your wedding dress.
If you really loved him you wouldn't be trying to push him into this.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2007): Honey you are wayyyy to young to be toying with sex. Its a huge thing.. Abstain and you might feel a little better about the consequences... It could be a month later he breaks up with you and you both will be a mess - ESPECALLY if sex s involved it would be alot more messier.. at your age things change over night... wait till you are a little more mature( and legal!) before you let passion get the best of you.. it really does take experience- and at least for the boys part- alot of emotionally maturity and growing up- to really have that adult connection. I know it may be hard.. but please wait... you wont regret it... Focus on school and family and activities right now in your life... pursue your dreams.. and then focus on being an adult... when you are an adult.. but you need to build more of a foundation with him at this time... be his friend and do activies together but keep in check the physical that way you wont be so as teased... hope this helps..
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (5 February 2007):
 You've got this all sorted out haven't you? lol You say you've known him since you were 2 months old. You can't remember anyone at 2 months old let alone know this boy. "We fell in love when we were just little kids" Do you know what it actually MEANS to really be in love with someone? (If you do, I'd like you to let me know). You've taken health classes for 6 years so you're pretty sure you know how to prevent pregnancy? The only way to prevent pregnancy love is either to abstain for sexual intercourse or use contraception, using a condom alone can't be guaranteed.
2 months is nothing to be in a relationship. How do you know when your boyfriend is ready? He'll let you know, simple! You seem to want to grow up too quickly. If you mention this to your boyfriend just now he'll probably run a mile. You need to slow down a bit and just enjoy being with him, learn more about him, for example... do you know his hobbies, his favourite foods, favourite colour, football team, if he had one wish what would it be? What does he look for in his ideal woman? What turns him on most? When did he last cry? Does he hate anyone? What's his favourite movie/book? What does he think about politics? Where would he most like to travel in the world? How many children would he like to have one day? What's his favourite car? Does he believe in God? What does he say is your best feature? Who was it upset him last? There are tons of questions I could ask you about this boy you say you love. Can you honestly say you can answer all of them?
If you can't then you need to get to know him better and put off having sex with him until you are older. You love him that much that you would even have him break the law in the chance he could be arrested and go to prison??? You are wayyyyyyyy underage for sex and him having sex with you just now is a criminal offence.... did you forget about that?
You both have plenty of time to wait before you are intimate with one another. Just enjoy being together and having fun for now, besides, sex is a whole different ball game, emotions come into play and it can cause a whole different set of problems.
Eve
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A
male
reader, David Lewis +, writes (5 February 2007):
 How can you tell when he is ready?
Until you are on some form of contraception, you are not ready yourself. Also, if you are both sure you will eventually be married, wait until you are both of legal age. Why risk jeapordising what you already have by becoming sexually active now. Take your time and just let things happen.
If you have to ask questions, then you are not ready.
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (5 February 2007):
 I'd imagine your boyfriend is put off by your age and wanting to wait until you're 16. This is sensible because if anyone finds out he's having sex with you before you reach the age of consent he could be charged with rape, whether it's consensual sex or not. When you say you know how to prevent pregnancy I have a really bad feeling you're talking about the withdrawal method where the guy pulls out before he comes. This doesn't work! If you're going to have sex you need to be using the pill or condoms or both. When you've sorted out the contraception side of things you need to sit down with your boyfriend and talk it all through maturely with him to find out if he's ready.
CD
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