A
male
age
30-35,
*pt
writes: Bare with me on this guys, I know I sound like a complete idiot for what I've done but if anyone can give me advice then I obviously need to say what's happened in the past.I was with my girlfriend for 1 year and 4 months. It started well, then after about 4 months I felt like it really wasn't for me. I broke up with her but she was certain that we should give it another chance. So I took her back and things where great again for about 6 months until we broke up again. And, yes you guessed it, we go back together after 2 weeks. Then 3 weeks ago I broke up with her again. The reason simply was I felt I wasn't happy all the time. I thought the grass would be greener with someone else. But I missed her so much after we broke up. I still miss her unbelievably. But I have broken her heart too many times now. I resent myself and the mixed feelings I have had for her all this time. And I resent my self for not appreciating her love and her beauty. In my head and in my heart I am aching for her back. I asked if we could give is one more try and she said she cant go through this again, I've broken her heart and we had our chance. But right now I feel I can give her everything. I feel loosing her like this has made me see what I've taken for granted, and I wanted to fix the damage I've caused. I want to love her completely and just try my best to be the best for her. I no this sounds like I'm just having a hard time with the break up, but this is genuine love I feel. The pain of loosing her is so deep its indescribable. Its my own fault it didn't work because she is a perfect girlfriend for me, I just always thought the grass was greener, and I felt I should be with someone else who shared more interests with me. I ignored my love for her, thinking I deserved something better, then I never did. Because she is the one for me.So basically what I'm asking from the people reading this is please give me some advice on how to prove my feelings for her, and how to get her back. I've broken her heart and calling her will not fix that. I feel like I need get the train to see her and give her flowers and sit down with her to talk about this. She is currently in the city where we go to uni together and I'm at home in the country. Should I go to her for give it more time? Any advice would be so greatly appreciated. And thanks for reading this idiots long message.
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female
reader, Charlpop +, writes (1 August 2011):
If you felt you had to break up that many times, maybe you just weren't meant to be in the first place. You're exactly right when you say you've broken her heart too many times. You can't keep hurting her by getting back together with her then leaving her again. I know it's not nice to hear, and you have my sympathy, but you've given her plenty of reason not to trust you.
Also, did you feel this way the other times you broke up? And then you got back together, but broke up again. So that you yourself don't end up getting hurt, don't only think about how you feel now but how you feel when you're unhappy with her. Maybe you were right when you thought the grass was greener elsewhere.
A
male
reader, Daniel the love doctor +, writes (1 August 2011):
Wow. That's a lot of breakups. And yes she has good reason for not wanting to get back together with you. But there still may be a chance. The hardest thing you would need to do is convince her that you will not break her heart again. A phone call may not do it..neither will flowers. But time may. I would give her some time, then tell her how truly sorry I am for breaking her heart, remind her of the good times, tell her that I love her, and if for the rest of my life, I'll make it up to her. But you have to be sincere. Don't say those things and later look for "grass greener on the other side". If you truly love her then you have to work on making things work...WITH HER. If she chooses not to start up another relationship with you, then you have to move on. The ball is in her court and she has to decide if she wants be with you or not.
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A
female
reader, Eyespy17 +, writes (1 August 2011):
Maybe you are too young if you Could not settle down and are still feeling "the grass is always greener".
Why did you think you were better than her? That's something that probably won't go away.
I say let it go.
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