A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I don't know how to deal with this. You see my boyfriend has had many girlfriends before me, and even though we've been together for two years it still bothers me. Knowing all the girls and guys he's been with and that he did sexual things with them, it just makes me want to cry. How do I overcome this? I love my boyfriend so much. I want our relationship to last for a long time, but sometimes it just hits me that he's the only one I've done sexual things with, and he's the only one I want to be with. But he's been with, and done things with all these different women how can I match up to all of them. Please help me! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, annakat +, writes (9 April 2011):
 That can be a rough thing to get over. I don't like it either to know that a guy has been with so many other girls. To me, giving away your body to just anyone is not ok. But then I'm not really one to talk because I have a lot of sexual experience with multiple partners and everyday I wish I could take it all back and just be with one man who's special to me. Consider that maybe he regrets it too and now wants to be with just you and no one else. If you really can't get over his past you'll never really be happy with him. Bernard was right to say that you are a prize. Don't settle for someone who isn't worthy of you.
A
male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (9 April 2011):
 The issue isn't about trying to match up to all of them. Each one had their good points and their bad points... and yes, some of them would have been better than you in some way, shape or form... but on the flip side, you are better than them in other ways... after two years, its safe to assume that the ways that you are better than the others are the qualities that he values most in a partner.
Think about it. Would you take a food critic seriously if he/she wrote a fabulous review for a restaurant if that was the only restaurant they'd ever eaten at...? Of course not. You'd take them much more seriously if they'd been all around the world, reviewed and tasted many varied cuisines and then declared one particular restaurant as their favorite. You're his favorite... so relax
Good-luck :)
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