A
female
age
30-35,
*shxs
writes:I don't know what to do, i've been with my boyfriend for 1 year and 10 months now, but when i'd only been with him for a month i left him for my ex. i realised how big a mistake i'd made and left him straight away. i talked to my boyfriend and he said he'd give me another chance. everything was fine for about 6 months after this. we got on great, couldn't have been better but then all of a sudden things started to go terribly wrong. i thought i could cope with it, that we would get through it, but now, a year and a half on it just seems unbearable now. He can't trust me at all and every time i go out with my friends he thinks i'm with another boy! i know it's my own fault bu ti really do love him and don't know what i can do to get him to trust me and to make this work. he said to me this morning that he just wants to be friends, this really broke my heart, however he later said that he didn't mean it and he was just annoyed with me. i don't know what to think. i know that he loves me and i really love him but what can i do to make this work? cause i really want it to..more than anything. i honestly don't know what i'd do without him! please help me
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female
reader, tshxs +, writes (19 November 2009):
tshxs is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI don't know what to do, i've been with my boyfriend for 1 year and 10 months now, but when i'd only been with him for a month i left him for my ex. i realised how big a mistake i'd made and left him straight away. i talked to my boyfriend and he said he'd give me another chance. everything was fine for about 6 months after this. we got on great, couldn't have been better but then all of a sudden things started to go terribly wrong. i thought i could cope with it, that we would get through it, but now, a year and a half on it just seems unbearable now.
He can't trust me at all and every time i go out with my friends he thinks i'm with another boy! i know it's my own fault bu ti really do love him and don't know what i can do to get him to trust me and to make this work. he said to me this morning that he just wants to be friends, this really broke my heart, however he later said that he didn't mean it and he was just annoyed with me. i don't know what to think. i know that he loves me and i really love him but what can i do to make this work? cause i really want it to..more than anything. i honestly don't know what i'd do without him! please help me
A
female
reader, BlueBag +, writes (17 November 2009):
 This is a hard situation. As you really have dug your own grave. Cheating so early on in a relationship tends to kill any trust before it really starts.
Some relationships can get over infidelity but it depends on the people involved. If he still doesn't trust you after all this time then he probably wont. I'm sorry to say.
You could try and give it one last shot, sit him down, tell him you made a huge mistake and you will never do it again. Ask him what you can do to make him feel more secure in the relationship. Ask if he feels he will ever be able to trust you fully again?
If he can't trust you again or if too much damage has been done to repair the relationship then leave it alone. There is no point in trying to fix something that is permanently damaged.
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