A
female
age
36-40,
*opa
writes:I am a young lady who has had hardships all my life and they seem never to stop..from the loss of my mum to my boyfriend for seven years to lack of a job for a year.....though some times problems seem to overwhelm me...i never give up...1st: i lost my mum at a young age and ever since i havent gotten over it..i dont even know how to get over it..i just keep it all in,,which is dangerous...2nd.: i broke up with my boyfriend of 7 years and much as i dont want him back forever i cant seem to get over him..while him he has moved on with another girl..i seem to be in the same place...i have tried like 2 relationships but they all seem empty,,,,and i know i will never love anybody else again..Funny thing is that i also never discussed it with any one so its all eating me up...some times i cry about it or even admit that am going crazy and just laugh about it.3rd: i finished my degree and i cant seem to get a job...i apply here and there but in vain..since i dont have my mother ..and am the 1st born...family support is limited,,,i can only act strong infront of everyone and hope that everything is going to be okey,.though my hope is slowly fading.I feel so depressed i dont even who to turn to...we dont have counsellors in our community who can help and friends always assume that i dont have problems because i always tend to smile in every circumstace, in fact i pretend so much.someone please tell me what to do because this is the only place where i can be real.any suggetions will be well appresciated.
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male
reader, Neboraic  +, writes (25 August 2009):
Do some volunteering, one thing that makes depression worse is having nothing to do but dwell on how miserable your life is. One way to bring hapiness and take your mind off all the bad things is volunteering. If you dont want that, then create a project for yourself, write a book, start a business, follow some interest that will occupy your thoughs. Also socialising, friends will help make you feel you are not alone, (although, at times when ive been depressed, i havent felt like socialising so i found it hard to do) but if you have the energy for it, then do it.
A
male
reader, Perspicacious +, writes (24 August 2009):
Unemployment, bereavement and heart break is enough to cause depression in anyone and with all three combined it's no surprise to feel overwhelmed sometimes.
The theme I sense from what you have written is that you have no outlet for your pain, so keep it all inside and are never able to reach any kind of closure as a result.
These issues really are ones that you need to explore with a counsellor but I do appreciate that accessing one is difficult in some places.
Have you tried talking to your doctor? They can be a great source of help, be that medication (antidepressants can really help in some cases), a referral to someone to talk to in you area that you might not be aware of, or at least someone to discuss how you are feeling with directly.
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