A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:My dad won't let me have a boyfriend and i'm 13. What can i do to allow me to have a boyfriend? He said i could do something called courting and thats when i invite a boy over my house to watch TV and my dad questions the hell out of him; that is way too embarrising to do.Got any suggestions? He also he thinks im going to get pregnant. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Devilish Angel +, writes (2 February 2008):
 Just relax and do the whole courting thing. Serious boyfriends come later. I got my first boyfriend when I was seventeen. You have a while to go before you can understand guys enough to be able to be with one. When I was thirteen, I was concentrating on school and other things I liked to do. I understand its frustrating seeing your friends out with their boyfriends/girlfriends and seeing them get stuff and look happy. However, being a couple means you get tied down and you have to think about your actions and how your boyfriend would feel about them.
A
female
reader, hello1  +, writes (2 February 2008):
 13 is too young. Please just be a kid. If I have children, I'm not allowing them to have a b/f or g/f!
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A
female
reader, Michelley-ox +, writes (2 February 2008):
 All dads are protective over their daughters its fact! because they were young once aswell and they know well that most guys are just out for sex which at your age may not be the case but it will be soon enough. you just need to let him know that he can trust you and that you wont make stupid mistakes with boys esspecially like getting pregnant at your age you should be aware of sex but virgin! your body isnt developed or ready for sex yet you should only do it when u are comfortable, older and ready.tell your dad that he can trust you to be honest with him rather than keeping things from him and have a boyfriedn without him beign aware and am sure he'll soon accept that you need your freedom
good luck x
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (2 February 2008):
 Meet the guys and then when he is the one, invite him home for a family dating to know your family especially your dad.
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (2 February 2008):
 Hi Sweetness,
I know that you think he's old fashioned, but 13 is kind of young to go out on dates. He really is being a good Dad by telling you that he wants to meet anyone who wants to spend time with you. Perhaps going out with a group of girls and a group of boys would be a better idea. You may think that you are old enough to make your won decisions, but it's up to your parents to judge what they think you are ready for. AND there are pregnant thirteen year olds, but most of them had parents who weren't meeting all of their friends and boyfriends!!!
If you DON'T argue and act out about this, and prove each and every time you are given a privilege, like a curfew that you have to meet or phoning in when they ask, they will be more likely to give you more trust. You have to earn trust by proving that you can abide by their rules. And they aren't making up these rules to embarrass you or make you life miserable, they are making them to keep you safe.
My thirteen year old niece wound up in a parking lot at midnight outside a theatre in the dark because she stayed for an extra show and turned off her cell phone and didn't have a pre-arranged ride home like she had told her parents. She broke every single rule her parents gave her and scared the bejeezuz out of herself AND her parents. So, you can see that we do make these rules for a good reason - sometimes you make a decision that ISN'T a good idea - mainly because young adults often think about what they want instead of the consequences of their actions. Parents love their kids and want to protect them, it's that simple.
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A
male
reader, Dr Vendetta +, writes (2 February 2008):
 well your dad is being protective, and doesn't want to see you get hurt.
and by that i mean raped.
thats right everyone else reading this i said raped.
I know many girls who have been and if i ever find the guys i will be posting their testicles on ebay.
have a read on this board and see the problems people are having with bfs. nmore to the point the ammount of girls 13 years old who are pregnant. have a read through them. you'll see usually the bf runs and leaves the girl to fend for her self. so.. yeah of course your dads gonna want to question the hell out of him.
its not so much as you getting pregnant.
its your bf pressuring your for sex.. you feeling that you have to let him have sex with you.. and oh he doens't like rubbers and oh look a bun in the oven.
again read through the posts on this board. give it a little time.
and hell.. why not let you dad speak to him.. embarrising yes. but if the guy does acutlaly like you then he'll sit through it.. and if you dad likes him he may give you more freedom.
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A
male
reader, Chris121 +, writes (2 February 2008):
Be happy he cares for you ^^. I know a lot of people who would kill to have a father that protective, and I can tell you most of them HAVE had a pregnancy scare at one point. At the same time, I've been quizzed by dad's and it's one of the most off putting experiences you can have with a girlfriend so I can see why your worried.
What I do is invite her and her family out to do something informal like the cinema. Your dad will be happy he can ask questions and get an opinion on him, but whatever your doing will keep him occupied and at bay enough so that he doesn't scare off your potential boyfriend. Plus, the more relaxed your boyfriend is, the more likely he is to get the answers right and enjoy the experience with you, opposed to being stuck in a room being questioned into a corner.
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A
female
reader, autumnleaves07 +, writes (2 February 2008):
13 is still very young. You have plenty of time for all that jazz when you get older. Your father is clearly very protective of you, and you're lucky to have someone who cares for you that much.
If you really feel strongly about it, you should try and sit down with him and talk to him as a grown up, and compromise. Maybe you could go out with a guy to the cinema and then your Dad could pick you up? That way your Dad isn't worried about your safety but you get to date someone. Good luck.
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