A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:hi guys, Ok your all going to think im total mad for this but i really cant help it,Im doing everything for my ex bf, who dumped me coming upto a yr now, i give him money sometimes when he really needs it, buys him drinks and will always listen and try to advice him on things even if he doesnt listenWe sometimes sleep together in the cars and we still talk on the phone everyday. The thing is hes got a gf whos pregnent and he doesnt love her and wants to leave her for someone else The truth is its not me and i wish it was i love him so dearly and will do anything for him and most likely always will and he does apreceate it i no he does and he trys helpng me if he can I really want him back but i cant make him see that, he says he wont go back to exs maybe he wont but why do we get on so well if he didnt like me that much How can i try and make him realise what hes missing with me ???
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female
reader, xanthic  +, writes (9 October 2009):
 He's not even worth the effort. He's clearly using you, and you continue to allow it by giving him everything he wants, without the complications and attachment that a relationship would bring. Aside from his lack of decency and a conscience, the biggest problem here is a lack of self-respect on your part, otherwise I don't think this situation would've been allowed to continue. No one should ever be treated in the way he treats you.
Move on and find someone else that will respect you, people like him don't change.
A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (8 October 2009):
 Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.
I hate this phrase, but it's appropriate here. Why would he buy the cow, when he gets the milk (and some milkshakes) for free?!
You are pretty much the greatest girl ever. You sleep with him, listen to him, buy him stuff, give him money. You are the ultimate free ride and the ultimate ex. He gets everything he could ever want from a woman with absolutely no commitment and no strings attached. Why would he want to have all the trouble of a girlfriend, of a relationship, when he gets everything good that comes with that now?
Ask yourself this, what else would he get if he was dating you?
And, let's not forget the pregnant girl. You sound like a smart girl, and you know that she's not at fault for anything. Don't you feel bad for her? Imagine if she was your sister and knocked up by some guy who cared less about her and was still getting frisky with his ex in cars? She doesn't deserve this creep, and neither do YOU.
You definitely need to start to respect yourself and your dignity. Guys have to WORK to be with you, honey! They shouldn't just have you working your butt off for them! This guy needs to chase YOU for awhile, you're making everything way too easy for him. But, I can't say I am encouraging being with him - he sounds like a real jerk (no offense). You deserve SO. MUCH. BETTER. And he deserves none of your attention. What has he done to deserve it? You say he appreciates it, and I'm sure he does appreciate getting all this attention, love, stuff from you - no strings attached. But he's taking advantage of you, of your love for him. If he wants to be with you, he needs to be yours 100%.
Good luck, sweetness. You deserve much, much better than this.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2009): Wow, he has it good... you screw him and give him cash and buy him drinks...
It's hard to see what's he's missing, your giving him everything he wants now... and he doesn't have to come home to you bitching everynight! I guess you could buy him a house!
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A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (7 October 2009):
 Madness. Talk about a lucky bloke! Real ego boost for him. And he sounds like a real good catch too! Not..
I cant understand why you would be bothering with someone that has a child on the way with someone else, and also has another girl on the go. He sounds like a right mucked up character. To be even thinking you want to be with him, kinda says you are mixed up too.
Seeing as I cant understand you wanting a guy like this, I cant say what would make him 'realise what he is missing' as this sort of lifestyle would be one of my worst nightmares. I would sooner go on the Saw ride at Thorpe park, and that rollercoaster is going some!
Just couldn't help commenting on the craziness of it x
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