A
female
age
30-35,
*xFruity
writes:So here goes, I have been best friends with this guy Ty since we were around 2 years old. His mom and my mom are BFF we spend thanksgiving and vacations together stay at each others homes blah blah blah you get it right? Anyhow I had a huge party at my parents beach house on the weekend and me and him were sitting on the beach (with his arm round me and a blanket) watching the fireworks talking about what a crappy year I've had, during this my bf who I have been with for almost 2 years stormed over and started yelling at us both then left the party altogether.He knew when we got together how tight me and Ty are, he has even found us asleep in my bed (fully clothed) and not reacted like this, so I just don't understand his problem?I didn't think that we were doing anything wrong, but I am looking for an outsiders opinion, and how I explain to my bf that me and Ty are just BFF.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2009): Your boyfriend sounds jealous for no apparent reason-yes he must love you because he was protective of you, but if he can't accept your best friends friendship, then he's not worth your time.
So what if he's a guy, it shouldn't make a difference if he trusts you.
But also, you need to work out why he freaked out at the party and not when you were in bed together (fully clothed!).
I think Ty gets you as much as your bf. He's your best mate after all. You also said you doubt that anything romantic would happen between you, but there is still a chance which I find thrilling. Are you sure you don't feel anything for Ty? Maybe a slight suspicion? If the answer is 100% no then no bf should worry about your precious friendship, but if you have any doubt, you should think carefully on it.
best of luck
A
female
reader, oxFruity +, writes (19 March 2009):
oxFruity is verified as being by the original poster of the question Yeah of course I love him he's the one person who I can turn to when everything else around me is messed up, but there is nothing romantic between us and I doubt there ever will be.I love my bf he is my all, no one has ever got me the way he has (I sound so lame and cheesy but its true) They both mean so much to me and I don't want my bf to feel threatened by mine ad Ty's friendship because that is all it is.
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A
male
reader, enjoimx  +, writes (19 March 2009):
 Mr. Me nailed it actually quite nicely. But consider this:Do you have feelings for Ty? You love him right? You cant see yourself advancing that relationship? Oftentimes as we mature, we start to realize that those people who we have amazing friendships with are actually great candidates for romantic relationships. See when we choose people based on our ideals (your bf), they oftentimes fall short (he cant stand TY). But there is more to an amazing relationship than our supposed ideals of the perfect bf.my friendship that blossomed into romance has been the best relationship I ever had. Unfortunately I didnt realize it at the time, I took her for granted. I dont want you to make that mistake.
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A
female
reader, HonningKanin  +, writes (19 March 2009):
 Mr Me I would ask why would anyone put their partner in a situation where they have to. They should have trust in their partner and be secure about their relationship. They should know partners can come and go but friends are normally forever. Whatever their gender may be.
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A
male
reader, Mr Me +, writes (19 March 2009):
 Lauryn, I think you just stated one of the biggest reasons a lot of guys have a problem with their girlfriend's best guy friend. And that is you would choose the best friend over the boyfriend.
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A
female
reader, Lauryn +, writes (19 March 2009):
Wow, I've lived this story many times. I have known my best friend Jake since I was a baby and we to have sleep overs, movie nights etc. Every guy I date knows from the beginning how close we are but in the end can not stand it and it is usually the reason we break up. I guess guys are insecure that our best freinds are males, they feel threaten by the "other guy". The way I look at it is, Im not giving up a life long friendship for any guy so if you date me you get Jake , we come as a package.
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