| A
female
age
41-50,
*reenEyedGirl
writes: I have been dating this guy for about two months. He seems to be an almost perfect match for me... we have a similar sense of humor, enjoy hanging out alone and in social situations, have a lot to talk about, and care for eachother well. However, he has been living with another girl for over two years who he is supposedly "just friends" with. She has a boyfriend also. My boyfriend seems to have the idea that this other girl he has been living with is "almost perfect" for him except that they do not get along sexually and don't even want to kiss. Other than that, they act like they are married. She is bossy and even yells at him sometimes. I am getting sick of dealing with this, and he knows it, and we are supposed to talk about it soon. He has been friends with her for a long time, so I don't want to destroy their friendship, but I can't put up with this situation for much longer. Also, other than this one thing, I really like this guy. Anyone have any advice?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Learning2Love +, writes (25 December 2006):
 Hi there, she is imposing herself on him and immasculating him before you, that is not what the 2 of you need. I was in a similar situation, but I had to draw the line and put her in her place, cos she was running riot...
Talk to him and tell him that you don't appreciate the way she's treating him,
she has no right to treat him in this way especially he she calls herself his friend. But how does he know that they're not sexually compatible?
A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (25 December 2006):
 Well it sounds a little strange. How does he know they don't get along sexually? Why has he told you they don't even kiss. This should be a given if they're just room mates. I can see why this would annoy you but remember, you're hyper sensitive to this situation because you like him. They may have a comfort zone with eachother you don't quite understand.
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A
male
reader, goodbutnotgifted  +, writes (25 December 2006):
 If you take time to think it out you'll be better off. The hardest thing to do is to stop and take time from all the emotional havoc and evaluate your reason for being involved, after you understand your position, then try to understand his, what are they to eachother and why does the talk have to be a scheduled "when your ready you will know" thing. Talk with the intent of building a stronger relationship with him, learn why she yells and he actualy responds as he does rather than leaving her. some guys prefer that type of relationship with women, but it'll be a friend. Remember the rude truckstop waitress? know why she never got fired? he may have a need for that. Strange as it seems But your position seems to suggest you need to be caught up in it, if this goes away what then? Are you sure your ready for a relationship with this guy? It sounds like your recovering yourself and might benifit from some time with a close friend, he sounds like the forgiving type.... I wish you luck.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 December 2006): "Female roomate" huh? More like his girlfiend - and she has another boyfriend as well.
Sounds like a real mess. Either he moves out and makes a clean break, or you consign him to your "past history" file. You are, after all, already fed up with this situation!
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