A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:If a guy hangs around with lots of women, does that mean he is a player, or could they just be his friends? I know some could be relatives too. I recently met this guy in a bar . We haven't been on a date yet, but he is on my friends list on Facebook, and we have each others phone numbers. I've looked at his photos on there, and there are lots of women on the photos with him, and on some of the photos, he is hugging them. I'm quite worried about this, and I'm wondering if I should go out with him if he asks me. What do you think? I feel funny about asking him about it though.
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male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (15 June 2011):
 The actual answer to this is no, he may be but none of that is concrete proof. I have very few guy friends and make friends with girls very easily so I hang out with alot of girls and i'm not a player. He may just be more comfortable with girls. It's easier to go to the bar with the opposite sex because there isn't really any competition, same goes for day to day life. Guys compete and I find myself wanting to get away from that.
You'll have to get to know him before making any judgement calls because he could have tons of friends who are girls but that doesn't mean he is trying to get with any of them.
A
female
reader, Orbiter +, writes (15 June 2011):
Well you really aren't going to be able to tell from some Facebook photos, they could easily be friends or family. One player I knew of deliberately avoided putting photos of himself on there with any women in so if he added a woman he met on a night out and liked she'd think he was single.My advise to you is if you liked him (ignoring any of this photo stuff) then go on a date and see how he behaves. If he pushes for sex on the first date or really soon after meeting each other then he sounds more like a player If he's telling you he loves you, or thinks you're the 'one' and can see himself marrying you/having kids too soon, then again it could be that he's just saying that to get you into bed. The best way to find out for sure is to not sleep with him for the first few months and don't set any sort of date/timeline either. If he's a player he more than likely won't stick around without some sort of hope or promise for sex.
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