A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am married to a strong-minded, controlling man. He will throw temper tantrums to get his way and to silence me when I try to speak up for myself. He has verbally attacked me many times with put downs,dtreating me like I am stupid. I have mentioned two incidents to him about his behavior. I was shocked when he told me he didn't say those things to me. I was looking right in his eyes to see if there were any signs of him possibly pretending not to remember. I am not trying to defend his bad behavior. Do anyone know if it's possible for a controlling person mind to go blank after insulting verbal attacks? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2010): He remembers. He is lying about it.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (2 October 2010):
The Multiple Personality Disorder Idea is an interesting one.
I am far more sceptical, however. Mental illnesses like that aren't all that common, and from what you've said, this man is not suffering from mental illness. He could have narcissistic tendencies, which would account for hit problems, Most likely though, he's got anger problems and uses them to control you.
Multiple Personality Disorder, or Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), as it's now known, would show itself in far more ways than your husband just being angry (you'd see changes in clothing, severe blackouts and memory loss over a longer period of time. As it is, your husband just gets angry, then goes into denial. That's not DID. So if you were to look for that, you'd need to spend a lot of time observing him for other things.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (2 October 2010):
The Multiple Personality Disorder Idea is an interesting one.
I am far more sceptical, however. Mental illnesses like that aren't all that common, and from what you've said, this man is not suffering from mental illness. He could have narcissistic tendencies, which would account for hit problems, Most likely though, he's got anger problems and uses them to control you.
Multiple Personality Disorder, or Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), as it's now known, would show itself in far more ways than your husband just being angry (you'd see changes in clothing, severe blackouts and memory loss over a longer period of time. As it is, your husband just gets angry, then goes into denial. That's not DID. So if you were to look for that, you'd need to spend a lot of time observing him for other things.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (2 October 2010):
 You know, when I read your question, I figured this is not just a mere controlling mind or the garb of a mental disorder. This is a classic sign of verbal abuse.The trickiest form of denial is forgetting. Become aware that forgetting is a form of denial that shifts all responsibility from the abuser to some “weakness of mind.”Check out these links...i think they might be of helphttp://andthenshecried.wordpress.com/2008/02/05/the-verbally-abusive-relationship-how-to-recognize-it-and-how-to-respond/http://www.leaderu.com/orgs/probe/docs/verbalabuse.html
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2010): Well, it's a well known fact that men who verbally abuse do have a personality disorder of some type. Usually , the reason he's like this is because somewhere in his past life, he witnessed type of behavior or this abuse was done to him. The verbal abuser, if confronted might possibly not recognize how their words, are hurting someone. Or do do you think he gets in such a rage, that he has that inability to face the reality of what he has done, rather than actually forgetting? Because I have never heard of anyone forgetting and it sounds like he does this often to you. I really think it's maybe time you talked him into getting into anger management and some serious counseling before this situation escalates into dangerous territories. Good luck and stay safe.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 October 2010): Yes he seems to be a totally different person when he verbally attack, and shortly after he is done, he seem not to notice the the amount of emotional damage that was inflicted on me or even notice the shocked, and numbness on my face. He just return back to his usual self, loving and sweet.
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A
female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (2 October 2010):
 Could he have multiple personality disorder? Does he seem like someone different when he verbally attacks you? You could try setting up a hidden video camera and catching his behaviour on tape so you can confront him with the hard evidence.
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