A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey ...I wrote on here about a year ago that I was leaving my school and couldn't imagine being without my class teacher who was my rock during my last 2 years of high school. I went through a huge depression and he was absolutly fantastic - supporting me, guiding me and always being there for me. We developed a very close bond - much more than an average student teacher relationship. I stayed behind after school and talked to him for hours.I was never 'in love' with him, but I have no idea how to explain how I felt for him nor what he meant to me.It's now almost a year since I left, and I go back there regularly to see my old class mates and him, and every time he sees me he gives me a huge smile comes over hugs me and stops what hes doing to talk to me for ages.Now I cannot stop thinking about him - I miss him so incredibly much. I cried myself to sleep last night becuase I missed him and just wanted to talk to him. What can I do? - I email him occasionally but I don't want to be overburduning, I'm friends with him on facebook and I check his profile everyday. What can I do? I don't need to get over him cos I was never in love - was I?Any advice, or similar experiences will be appreciated.Thanks, xx
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female
reader, Tevote  +, writes (12 June 2009):
 We could all tell you to get a life, that it's just a teenage stage-which it might be.
But you're the only one who can know what you truly feel, when you're older you will look back and understand what this is.
As for now-he isn't your teacher, he's your friend. He wont mind you emailing him at all sounds like you have a great friendship from what you've written about him-just don't email him every night.
If you feel close with him, then don't throw away your friendship. It can be very harsh on yourself and him too.
Just go with it, don't over step any boundaries- aspecially if he's married or involved with someone. I'm not saying that you should admit something if he's not with someone, i'm just saying you don't want to cause problems.
The best thing to do is just continue being his friend, if that's what you think anyway. Go with what you feel, emotions shouldn't be ignored but neither should boundaries.
goodluck
A
female
reader, shaunthesheep +, writes (11 June 2009):
i am having a similar problem, i dont know wot to do either! I am in love with him, and nothing will change that. Its going to be very sad, not to have him as a teacher anymore as i have finished school!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2009): "get a life"
Is not appropriate.
It just sounds like you really needed someone, and the help, support, advice, care, sympathy, etc. that he gave you captured you. You became addicted to it and he was probably the only one who made you feel like getting up every morning. He was the only person who gave you the attention you were really craving and the only one who sypathized and made you feel like what you were going through mattered.
That does not mean you are or were in love with him. But the appreciation and gratitude you feel for him cannot be replaced with any other feeling or person.
It can however, be faded out.
The key is to go out with friends, get into hobbies, meet new people, chhange SOMETHING in your life so that you have something new to think of when you go home at night. Ocuppy yourself with enough other activities and people taht you don't need this one particular teacher to make you feel worthy or to make your life feel competent.
Bobbles was correct in saying that you should gradually see him less and talk to him less. Make yourself and your mind less dependent on what he has to offer you.
And maybe eventually, he will be like just another friend who you look forward to seeing.
~SY.
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A
female
reader, bobbles32  +, writes (11 June 2009):
 It sounds like he's your security blanket and when you're not around it for a long time you get upset, sounds pretty normal. You just need to slowly break out of that by making the visits less frequent and over time just get over it.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2009): I think that you are definitely in love with im, i mean you think about him 24 / 7 but you need to move on, get a life.
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