A
female
age
,
*outherngirl
writes:I know I'm probably not gonna like what I hear, but I need to know what you think anyway. Several months ago I started seeing someone, and please take into consideration that we have known each other since childhood, and have since been great friends, but he is married. He was separated from her when I first started seeing him, and 5 wks. into our relationship he told me. Their relationship is extremely rocky...they go back and forth constantly, and there is NO trust whatsoever. She calls him constantly, when she goes into work at night, and you should hear the questions and the tone of her voice. I don't understand how he keeps taking it. I had begun to feel as if she had something on him or he was afraid of her, so I asked and of course he denied this. But he has told me in the past that she said if she caught him with me again she would kill us both. By the way, she does know about me. When they were separaed, she pulled into their driveway, when we were pulling out. There was a huge scene, mainly between the two of them, and he did stand up for me. The police were called and one happened to be a friend of mine. She later told me to watch my back because his wife was unstable. I have tried on several occasions to put a stop on our relationship, so that he could work on his marriage. Twice he came back to me, and just recently I couldn't stay away. Our relationship isn't about sex, we have only had sex once. We just have so much fun together. We get along so well, and he has never had anyone who treats him with the love and respect that I have for him. And I truly trust him with my life. If I needed anything I know that he would be there for me and my children, should I add. I honestly do not believe their marriage will last, sooner or later someone is gonna get fed up, or kill each other, and I really want this man. Please help! Reply to this Question
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male
reader, auvi  +, writes (30 November 2007):
You have your emotional needs for which you would need someone such a friend to stay close. Which is why a part of you wants to hold him to yourself. now the problem is that his wife. to be honest, she has the right on him first. what you should do is to make up your mind. you need to decide that what role should he play in your life. affair or best friend for life... if you pick the later one, then you two have to face it. then the hardest part is to convince her. arrange a dinner between 3 of you. tell her frankly that you will stay only as his friend and you would also value if you get her friendship as well...
A
female
reader, Minelisse  +, writes (30 November 2007):
 If he is so fed up why doesn't he get a divorce? You shouldn't be between them because, like it or not, they are married and remain married! You have no right interfering in someone else's marriage; respect and then ask to be respected!
My advice would be to give them the space to work things out, if he doesn't want to loose you he will get a divorce and then move on with you. However, with you in the middle they will not be able to work things out.
Be careful of the wife if she has acted up, stress can make someone loose it and you or your children could be in danger. Take care!
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A
female
reader, pgissyd  +, writes (30 November 2007):
 ooo you have yourself a submissive!
Some men get really turned on, cheating on there wives, making up stories to their mistresses about how evil the wife is, knowing they will go home and be punished by the wife.
Why doesnt he just leave her? have you asked that? I will tell you, its because he loves the attention, he loves the way she dominates him, and he loves knowing he can control you, you push him away, but he says here puppy and along you run.
This is not the guy you knew in school, he has changed as all men do. You are part of a fantasty game, and your so far in you cant see it.
walk away from this player and dont let him hurt you the way he will do.
Dont fall for his lines, dont listen to his lies, dont kids yourself that the wife doesnt know when your around or even encourage him to paly with you so she can dominate him.
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