A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi. I really need some help here. i recently met this guy who seems perfect for me. we're both really into art and the outdoors, and he's a perfect gentleman. the only problem is, i'm 16 (about to be 17) and he's 21. i feel really iffy about this relationship because i know my family would object. i just really dont want to pass up a guy who i know i could seriously fall in love with and be happy with. please help! haha i'm so lost.thanks a bunch! :) Reply to this Question
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female
reader, jenna1228 +, writes (29 July 2009):
well I told him I'm 16 and I don't think he cares. He's a bit immature for his age, like all guys. I feel so much better but now I'm worried about my family accepting him oh no lol. We'll see where this goes. im just so torn, because i feel like this could be something, then all of a sudden i feel like i should just cut it off and end it for the both of us. like that would be the best thing to do, even when i know it wouldnt be. im so confused.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2009): you are 16 it is not illegal(not that dating is illegal before 16 anyway)and your parents cannot stop you.age is only a number so if this is what you want then go for it,and dont take notice of anyone who gives you grief over it.just be happy.
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A
female
reader, jaime90  +, writes (25 July 2009):
 i was 17 when me and my bf got together, and he was 22. we waited until i was 18 to do anything sexual, the age difference isnt significant with us because i am mature and he well isnt haha!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2009): The age difference will not be significant in a few years, anon, though it is a bit borderline right now. If he is the gentleman you say, he will not be pushing you beyond a close friendship. Your feelings may change within two years,..so may his. So, I would not think of a serious romance right now. People are different and mature at different rates. But the age will still be a factor to your family, I am sure, for a few more years. Take care. Tom
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A
male
reader, tonik  +, writes (25 July 2009):
 Hello young lady this really depends on the culture you are in, I don't see it could be a problem because the age difference is just normal, like you are saying.. Why would you let a gentleman like that pass you knowing that he could be Mr. Right? I therefore say go on with dating this guy but tell your parents yet, maybe if you two were meant to be, there won't be a problem for your parents, adding to that I'd say at least a guy at 21 is a little bit matured and would know how to handle a lady. I hope you understand what I'm trying to say.
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A
female
reader, ogxtina +, writes (25 July 2009):
I just recently turned 17 in April and my boyfriend is 19. We are NOT sexually active. We are waiting until I turn 18 to be safe.
If you really think this guy is the one, then be with him. But be careful. Go with your heart, don't think too much. And your family, is your family. Talk to them, convince them, and don't give up. I'm extremely proud of myself to not give up on my boyfriend because of my family. They were not happy with our age difference, but as they got to know them, they are proud I'm with him now.
Good luck!
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A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (25 July 2009):
 Hi friend, THink about this do you really think you have a long term future with this guy or is it just a summer fling, puppy love etc because if it is in ten years you wont even remember this guys name or want to be with him. But if what you think you have is real then go for it regret will last a lifetime but so can true love if you believe in sutch things. The your ages should not be a deal breaker obviously he knows your younger then him so hopefully he wont rush you in to things to fast and let you enjoy the golden sunset of your childhood years. well i hope this is of some help to you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2009): this is a difficult situation because technically its illegal. it comes down to what you think. do not tell yourself what you want to hear.. and dont be blind by the situation. i am not saying this applies to your situation.. however, alot of the time when an older male gets with a younger female, he is merely using you. i am only mentioning this for your safety so you do not get hurt in the long run. you obviously know him better than i would..haha.. so think clearly and truthfully on what you think his intentions are. you may not find out right away because he acts like a perfect gentleman at first, but that is only to lure you in. just look for signs..like him pressuring you or making you feel uncomfortable in Anyway..etc i believe that sincere guys are out there so i hope this applies to him. i think love can happen at any age and can happen with anyone. age is just a number. i think the only way to approach this situation is to introduce your family to him so they can see this good guy you want to date. .. then take it from there.!..if it does not work out for whatever reason, just remeber everythign happens for a reason and things that are meant to happen have ways of working themselves out.. those are the words of wisdom i live by:) i hope this helped because that is what i would do. i have been there! and im 17 too :) good luck!
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A
female
reader, imcurioustoo +, writes (25 July 2009):
Well I don't know him but just be careful there's a lot of sick people who prey on younger girls im 17 myself .. I know.. I think you should talk to your mom about it.. Tell her how nice he seems and how she would feel if you 2 tryed dating .. The most she'll do is get a lil upset and yell.. Its not the end of the world if that happens lol.. Best of luck sweetie -maddie
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