A
male
age
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*illw
writes:On a chance meeting I briefly chatted with a woman younger than myself. I'm 15 years her senior. She's 30 and has a young child. Amazingly I was instantly attracted to her, and now I cannot get this woman out of my mind. I cannot become involved with this woman but due to a distant business relationship have contact with her from time to time. Why oh Why does this woman stick like glue in my head ? Love at first sight ? I can hardly believe it. Help me get this gal out of my mind. Many thanks from Canada Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2010): Even if you break all contact with her you will still think of her because if you really care for someone they get imprinted in your mind, trying to forget will only subdue your feelings till your next contact and you said because of business you do occasionally have contact. So I would say be a man and face the situation head on, accept her friendship be patient and a true friend for her but always be honest to her about your feelings for her. Even admit that you don't want to bother her but are always there to listen or talk about anything. She sounds like a sensible woman who if single with a young child has probably had her fare share of relationship problems so is reluctant to get involved and know doubt puts her young childs well being before her social life. Either way any woman can always do with a friend who genuinely cares for them especially an older man who has probably seen and heard quite a bit in life (though important to try not to ever sound condesending) . Friendship can build a much stronger relationship in the long run. Talking and understanding is so important but it is so often overlooked. Most relationships break down with no contact after which seems strange when considering how close two people were at some point in their relationship. If people can converse enough about everything without secrets it is possible to deal with nearly every situation and keep a solid base. By being her friend you may also learn more about yourself and yes you may both go off in different directions with different people if it really is not to be, but better to face things directly than hide away with your feelings of what may have been or if onlys trapped away in the depths of your mind. Contact that girl and wish her a Happy New Year!
A
male
reader, dirtball  +, writes (22 December 2010):
 Well, if you've tried, then I guess that's all you can do.
Usually your best bet for getting over someone is to cut all communication with them and find other stuff to keep you occupied. Delving into a hobby or passion usually helps. Maybe join a club, or find some volunteer stuff to do.
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A
male
reader, billw +, writes (22 December 2010):
billw is verified as being by the original poster of the question thank you for all your answers - unfortunately I didn't supply enough info. This woman is not interested in me - wants to be friends - but I'd like something more from this relationship - but - alas - it's not to be. So I want to get her out of my head - I don't want to get obsessionary. I'm not in a relationship. But I want to forget her. I dont want to bother her anymore.
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female
reader, Sahara z  +, writes (21 December 2010):
Why can you not get involved? Are you already in a relationship? Is this woman? If you are both single then why not contact her more often, get to know her, if she won't get out of your head then maybe she feels the same way and you shared a moment that may well be the start of something. No harm in becoming friends.
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A
female
reader, rossoreiloveyoubaby +, writes (21 December 2010):
well does she know your 15 because if not then i think you best tell her shell understand nd if she is 30 i dont think you have a chance otherwise it would be wrong abye you should look again there pleantly more fish in the see
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A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (21 December 2010):
I'm wondering the same thing. A distant business relationship is nothing but an excuse. Ask her out.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (21 December 2010):
 Exactly why can't you get involved with this woman, Hummm?
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