A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Okay, this is not strictly a relationship question but it relates to the situation that I have been left in after a break up.If your health had been not good for some time (due to the stress of the relationship and also because of having to do the wrong kind of work for too long) and jobs in the area that you really excel at and need to do in order to be happy are just not forthcoming, would you:a. Sell your property and buy a much smaller/less nice one for cash, even though your property is lovely, but you can't afford the mortgage? ie. do this hoping that your situation will improve and to get rid of stress meanwhile.b. Stay put in the lovely flat and claim any benefits that you can to help to pay the mortgage (I think this is only possible in certain circumstances and only for one year)? Again, in hope that your situation will improve.c. Sell up altogether and move (even temporarily) to a different part of the world where jobs in your area will be more forthcoming? This might mean literally moving to the other side of the world whilst not very well.I am having real trouble deciding this because of my health. Due to earlier responsibilities as a parent I was never able to do all the socialising that is necessary to "get in early" to the kind of work that I need to do - BUT I am at the top of my game in terms of qualifications etc. Many thanks!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2011): Thanks for answering everyone! I'm going to see if I can convert my mortgage to an interest only type for the next few months until spring comes and then sell up and move on. I think if I have something really solid for the foundations of a new life then this will be a good basis to build on and hopefully get my health back. And, I can always rent it out if I decide to go overseas, without worrying about paying a mortgage. Really, really helpful advice from you all, thanks so much!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 December 2011): I would do C because A and B sound like stop-gap measures where you have no back up plan if your situation still doesn't improve. And since you've already established that there aren't jobs in your area, there seems to be little point in staying because there doesn't seem to be room for improvement.
Option C sounds like it is a better solution to me because you are doing something NEW, not just waiting for an old situation to change. But I wouldn't sell first and then move to the new place. I would try to get a job in the new place first (via phone interviews), and THEN sell your house and move there once you've got a job.
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A
male
reader, 40somethingguy +, writes (2 December 2011):
Its option A all the way
Once the stress of your current day to day life is reduced to a manageable level then you can proceed with your life in an orderly and solid fashion
No one ever thinks or acts sensibly when they're stressed
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A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (2 December 2011):
 A but C sounds good, unfortunately there is a world wide recession on, so your not guaranteed to get a job abroad. Also you may find problems selling your flat, the housing market isn't that good now, lots of people are losing their jobs.
B Isn't sensible, they pay only the interest on the mortgage but can you live on £50 pounds a week and pay utility bills and all your needs, not much extra for anything else. Besides, it's not money for nothing, they will make up noise and still expect you to go find work, they might stick you on some scheme and expect you to stay there all day. I think you can't claim benefits unless your unemployed for 6 months and have savings of less that £16K. It's not as easy as the newspapers make out, so I choose option A.
What about renting out a room, that might help if you have the space.
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A
female
reader, bluecow +, writes (2 December 2011):
 There are pro's and con's for both...
a) probably the most practical...
i-it would allow you to keep a secure home (owning outright instead of mtg)
ii-it would allow you to keep your support network of friends, family and your children close by
iii-it would give you time to sort out your health without worrying about wheere the next months mtg payment is coming from
iv-it would give you the time (more than 1yr) to find a suitable job which may or may not come.
b) Great temporary soloution...
i- it would allow you a bit of breathing space before choosing a or c.
ii- you get to stay in the home you love
iii- you can keep your support network of family friends and children
iii- you could have 12mo to find a suitable job which may not happen
iv- 12mo to sort out your health
c) the most drastic and life changing, but also most exciting....
i- you would lose your support network but gain a whole set of new friends
ii- guarenteed job
iii- possibly lower house prices, so you could live mtg free too
iv- no time to sort out your health issues
For me I would probably chose B (if its an option for you), and if a job wasnt forthcoming within 6mo, I would be then deciding which of A or C I was going to do. B gives you some breathing space and allows you to test the water a bit longer for a job, before making any big life changes.
I wish you all the best, and hope your health improves soo. Let us know how you get on!
xx
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (2 December 2011):
 I'd start with option A.
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