A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Im woman married for four years now. Our relationship has been mainly long distant for the past five years. We have one child, a daughter who is 2 years old. The hubby does not provide for the family. If i try to ask him, he gets defensive and says that the daughter has a long way to go, he is going to provide at a later date. When I ask him of plans to stay together, he seem not to be concerned and does not concrete answers. During holidays, he would rather spend with his friends or his relatives and not his family. When I tell him that i feel unloved or m,ay be he is cheating, he tells me thats its in my mind. We live in different countries. The guy has no direction of our marriage and yet he wants us to have another child? Its basically loveless marriage and Im contemplating of getting out.
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male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (14 June 2010):
 And yet you continue the charade? If it's support you want,get a good attorney and file for divorce.
A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (14 June 2010):
 Why do you live in separate countries? That's got to be difficult for you. Support for your child shouldn't have to wait until later either. It seems the younger they are, the more they actually do need, so he needs to be lending that support now.
Your feelings are not in your mind, as you'd say a hallucination may be. It is as far as thinking about it, but the feelings which prompt such thought are real. Would it matter how I think someone should feel? or Does it matter how they actually feel? He may look at things different, but that doesn't mean the way you view it is any less important. These are your feelings and how you feel. That should be enough for him to take a look into what is really going on.
I don't blame you for wanting out. Maybe telling him that you two should just part ways would be enough for him to see what's really going on. That would be up to you. It's almost as if you're single and alone anyway.
I hope this helps. Take care.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (14 June 2010):
And I would agree with you. You've spoken to him on several occasions and nothing has changed. He's not doing anything at all for you and your daughter, and you might just as well be single and happier. I think you would do much better to end it and move on. Don't let this guy drag you and your daughter down.
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