A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My b/f and I were having an argument the other day on the highway coming home, at one point during the fight, he pulled off his ring and put it on the dash of the car. A few minutes later he pulled over, rolled down the window and threw the ring out. I was so pissed off, I took off my ring and said, "that's fine, I'll do the same." and I pitched my ring out the window as well. A few min. later when the realization hit him, he got out of the car and started looking through the weeds for the rings. After I stopped hysterically crying, I got out and started looking too. We never found either of them.My b/f has since offered to buy replacement rings for us, but I'm superstitious and feel like it'll never be the same. Am I being ridiculous? I really loved my little ring, we are not married, but 2 years ago we both each other wedding type bands that we always wear. Now I feel a part of our history has been destroyed. I feel like he doesn't value me or our relationship now that he did that. He's been married before, and fought with other the women, but he still has the rings they gave him. I'm the only one he was willing to throw away. Is that a bad sign in this relatonship, or are we just two passionate, hot-headed people incapable of going too far? Even though we made up since then, it feels like we are disconnected now. Is it just me?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2010): I disagree with some of the posts as I think rings are symbolic and throughout history lets face it they represent a great deal including commitment and love - otherwise we wouldn't bother with wedding rings would we. Anyway.... in understanding that throwing away your rings meant a short sighted hot-headed way of throwing away your feelings or love it is clear that in the heat of the moment whilst it felt right it was not the way your truly feel about one another. I wonder if you are both actually frustrated about other things - money? living arrangements? lifestyles? Maybe have a think because this situation and what has happened may give you a chance to renew or revive what you have built so far, start fresh in a more positive direction and maybe you both need more from one another and not less. Just my thoughts.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (23 June 2010):
Actually, there was so much emotion here that you probably love each other very much. The more emotion we show, the more we're hurt, which means we care more. You've both behaved like hot headed toddlers who have thrown your toys out the pram. The good news is the toys, or rings in this case, can be replaced. So sit down, get talking, both say sorry and admit you've been hot headed and a little too silly, and move forward. You'll probably find that your relationship will be stronger because of it. But not without you both eating your own words and actions first.
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A
male
reader, Universe Man  +, writes (23 June 2010):
"The things you own end up owning you." --Tyler Durden
May I first point out that you referred to his ring AS YOURSELF. "I'm the only one he was willing to throw away." He didn't throw you away. You are still together. It was just a piece of metal. "Now I feel a part of our history has been destroyed." Again, a strange thing to say. We're talking about small decorative objects here. I'm not trying to be rude, but people need to not get so wrapped up in THINGS.
In the heat of the fight, he wanted to hurt your feelings, and you wanted to hurt his back. These are not good signs.
It's a tough economy out there. Don't spend money on jewelry. Focus on your relationship, not the objects that symbolize your relationship.
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A
male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (23 June 2010):
 Sorry for the loss of your rings... but I had to laugh just a lil' bit at how dramatic it all was... You both sound like very passionate, stubborn and independent people.
You can look at this in a positive light, even if you are superstitious... If he still has all his ex wives rings, but not yours, doesn't that mean you've broken the pattern? You're different from all the others... no?
Maybe throwing the rings away but then both running back searching for them and buying new rings could be a symbolic sign of a fresh start?
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (23 June 2010):
 I totally agree. You got into a fight and you did something drastic, dramatic and stupid. Hey, it happens. It wasn't violent, or vicious at least. And, at least a few minutes later the guilt and stupidity struck him and he pulled over to look. I think that maybe you're still angry or in shock from such an intense argument, and it seems to me that if you guys really love each other that you can get over this. The new rings will mean that much more, and trust me - you'll never be chucking them out a window again.
Good luck, sweetness!
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (23 June 2010):
 Heh...that was a stupid thing for both of you to do, and I know you both regret it. You're reading a bit too much into it. I think it was just a fight that went horribly awry. Think of it this way - better the rings out the window than ash trays at each other's heads or something!
If you still care for each other, make a new commitment to each other and seal it with new rings. It's okay to make up, renew your feelings for one another, and open a new chapter in your lives together.
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A
female
reader, Oregongrl1 +, writes (23 June 2010):
It means you both need to grow up!
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