A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I just want to know whether this married man loves me or not.. We've been good friends for sometime now.. we have shared almost everything.. he had a child few months back .. we both like each other.. more than friends.. to be frank i look good compared to him. He always says that i look so cute and beautiful, whenever possible he keeps complimenting me and i found him watching me from far away place which makes me shy. He told he had a girl friend who was very beautiful compared to his wife. He seldom speak about his married life but he talks about his kid. Does this guy likes me?
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female
reader, Doris Dolittle  +, writes (3 May 2010):
Hello,My God, when I read this it's like an exact parrallel with something I am going through right now! Almost identical. There is someone I work with who is obviously interested, does the same stuff and loves the fact I fancy him back. The weird thing is he is flabby, reeceding, middle-aged and hardly good-looking or charismatic but I find him irresistable. I think it's cos he's so bad. He has a wife (she's just had a baby too!), a stunning mistress plus some other bits on the side dotted here and there.....and wants me on top!!! Bizarre.Okay, I'm not suggesting for one minute that he doesn't like you or fancy you. Let me tell you a few things I am sure about your friend then you can make up your own mind:-1) he is a 'player' and compulsive liar and thinks nothing of saying any old tosh if he thinks it will get him what he wants or can save his sorry ass. I would take anything he says with a huge pinch of salt.2) he's not considering you or your feelings in all of this, or those of his mistress and wife either. In short he isn't very considerate to women generally and doesn't see them as people, just objects to meet his needs.3) he is forming what is known in psychological terms as a 'narcissistic harem'. I.e. he has a whole chain of women in place to stroke his ego and make him feel virile, attractive etc.. The question you have to ask yourself is why is it so important he loves you back? Do you think you could change or tame him maybe. I can see why that would be attractive but he's not going to treat you well and I'm sure you must have enough self-esteem not to tolerate that.Personally I would try and find someone else to focus your energy on who is worthy of you.
A
female
reader, lizzies-t +, writes (20 February 2010):
You might need to take a step back from this, babe.There are alot of players on this chessboard and you don't want to become one of them. It's safer for you and it'll save you the heartbreak afterwards.The best thing is just to concentrate on someone or something else. I bet you're beautiful and there are other guys out there besides him who find you attractive.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (20 February 2010):
No, not at all. He's just after using you like he uses this other girl and his wife. Don't go near him.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek  +, writes (20 February 2010):
 Why do you want to be involved with a man who has a wife, a kid and a girlfriend?? Do you just like the drama? RUN AWAY! Who cares if he likes you? This guy will cause you nothing but heartache!
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