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He takes offence when I don't swallow his cum.

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (18 February 2008) 23 Answers - (Newest, 2 January 2011)
A age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I tried really hard to talk to my boyfriend about him cumming in my mouth, because he loves the thought, but whenever he has in the past, I've had to stop myself gagging. I don't think it's the taste, but kind of the gooey texture.. I just don't want him to, but he took so much offence when I tried telling him that it's nothing personal.

What can I do? Thanks for taking the time to read my question.

View related questions: swallow, text

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2011):

I know the feeling. I can't swallow either because it makes me sick!! My boyfriend used to get offended all the time, until I finally had to sit down and explain to him that I physically can't take it. We talked about it WITH CLOTHES ON and we decided not to do oral anymore. As much as he loved it, it wasn't fun for me. If he really wants you for you, then maybe you should tell him that you can't swallow it.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2010):

some guys get bent outta shape if a girl doesnt swallow their jizz. I personally only enjoy it if the girl Im with gets off on it. the girl im with now likes the taste and texture of my sperm and swallows often; it is highly erotic if you know your partner enjoys it too, but forcing a girl to do it is a recipe for disaster.one of my exes only let me come in her pussy and even hated my cum being on hrer skin, much less her mouth.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2010):

ill just say that any man willing to go down on a woman through completion deserves to have a woman do the same. My wife will not and it baffles and frustrates me to no end.

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A male reader, its_real South Africa +, writes (17 December 2010):

Ok, reality check. If a man thinks that this is enough of an issue to bring up to his woman, and the woman won't do it... guess what?! The man is TELLING her that he is not sexually satisfied. And, it is a sure bet that he will find this pleasure elsewhere. She doesn't have to swallow, but she should be fully aware he TOLD her (women complain that we men don't communicate) that he was not being satisfied. So she shouldn't be surprised to find out that he's getting it from someone else. Newsflash.. if a man is satisfied at home, he doesn't have reason to wander.

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A male reader, BBC4HotWF United States +, writes (5 October 2010):

Any man should go with his woman's preference and not force her to swallow. I find women that can take most of me int their mouth often enjoy swallowing.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2009):

If I were a guy it would turn me off completely if my significant other did not swallow my cum. I'd take it as a sign of rejection, which it is. When you totally love and adore a guy you will swallow his cum a thousand times. I do not get grossed out by bodily fluids. They are beautiful and natural. Some do taste a bit like mushed up mushrooms though which can be nasty tasting, but maybe if you can get something in your mouth like a tic tac that might help things along.

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (4 March 2009):

Tisha-1 agony auntYou know, I answered this question over a year ago, lol. I wonder how things went? She was willing enough to give him oral sex, she just didn't want him to come in her mouth. Isn't that a good enough compromise?

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A male reader, mulattoman United States +, writes (3 March 2009):

mulattoman agony auntUse Tisha-1's advice if you don't want your problem solved. If he isn't getting it from you, he'll get it from some one else. That I can promise. That doesn't mean do things you don't want to... each of you needs to compromise.

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A male reader, jake5 United States +, writes (22 November 2008):

Okay every women has the right to swallow or not. I think being happy in the sack is very important for both men and women. So just marrie someone who can please you in the way you need to be please.If she wasn't swallowing when you met her then you can't expect her to start now. Stop trying to change people and just date or marry who you can be happy with in life.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2008):

My wife and I have been married for 17 years and we have more sex now than ever before... Two things had to happen for this to occur - #1) I had surgery to ensure she could never get pregnant again - 4 kids was enough #2) I've never asked her to do more than she is comfortable. I have always enjoyed both sides of oral sex (giving and receiving) my wife tried swallowing once and didn't like it so now we have clean (wet and dry) towels handy. When I am about to release I pull away and use a disposable towel. Then she wipes her face and hands with a clean towel and I do the same and there are many times afterwards where my wife is wanting to go back at it again just to bring me down softly. She's comfortable - I don't care where it goes and so she is totally relaxed. I've never asked her to do this without washing after intercourse nor have I ever kissed her after doing this for her or visa versa (well when I offer this for her I still say it's for my benefit). When we play games we know the boundaries in advance. I've also never played a game where I treated her dirty, sleazy or anything similar. I am willing to role play but not at the expense of her character. I consider myself lucky and am willing to do whatever to keep her feeling comfortable and free so that my luck continues. I'm 40 - I've lost a little bit (maybe even a lot) of what attracted her to me and yet bless her heart she still finds me a turn-on. If she wants me to sing her a song I'll do it and I won't do anything that I know she doesn't like or that I might not like doing myself if the wheels were reversed.

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A male reader, 17Irish17 United States +, writes (10 March 2008):

Anything you dont want to do, you shouldnt have to.

Having said that, I had a girlfriend once who didnt like to swallow. She didnt like the taste. I was fine with that. One time, thought, she offerd to swallow. She actually liked it and said that my sperm tasted better and felt different.

Now, I am not sure how true it is, but some people say the man's diet has a lot to do with all this. I heard a lot of fruit and vegitables help.

Maybe this will help, if its just the taste or feel of his sperm.

If it is a matter of just not liking to do it or even try to do it, that is your right!

Good luck

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A male reader, Atlguy United States +, writes (19 February 2008):

Collary,

I sense that response was aimed at me. Sex is important, no? If I wanted a sexless marriage, we would just be roommates. We basically are anyway. Maybe the swallowing thing was too specific, but you need to like the same things or have similar bedroom personalities, otherwise forget it. Men will resent the women their with and take it as rejection. What if the tables were turned and I'm going down on my wife and switch to my finger right when she's about to orgasm. I'd never hear the end of it.

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A male reader, Collaroy Australia +, writes (18 February 2008):

Collaroy agony auntHi,

I feel sorry for women these days, even one of the posters above stated he wouldnt've married his wife if he knew she wouldnt swallow before hand. What a swell guy. Good grief, I didnt realise men like this existed these days ( well , at least men who can figure out how to turn a computer on ). But obviously they do.

Tell him you will swallow but only if he is prepared to share with you, it is a sharing experience after all.

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A female reader, supersquirrel United Kingdom +, writes (18 February 2008):

supersquirrel agony auntif it's the texture you don't like, then make it bypass your mouth... i always got my ex to warn me when he was about to cum, at that point i'd take him as deep into my throat as possible, then i didn't feel it or taste it! hope this helps xx

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A female reader, duskyrowe United Kingdom +, writes (18 February 2008):

duskyrowe agony auntI think swallowing semen is ewwwwwww!!!!. As Tisha said throw up and make gagging noises. Nice one Tisha LOL.

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A male reader, Atlguy United States +, writes (18 February 2008):

Wow, if you were married, I'd say you should. It is something you can work up to. My wife of 2 years refuses and this is an issue for me. Not a dealbreaker, but if I'd known she didn't like giving them and rejected me by not "finishing" I might not have married her. But do you enjoy the act? If you do, you can always spit it out. I wouldn't be offended by that, but my wife won't even do that. Maybe swallowing is overrated, but most guys love it and the upside for you is, he will do anything for you for this one act.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2008):

lol 'phiatiger'. I never thought of it that way I wish I had that advice when my ex used to ask me to do it. AND Tisha 1 that comment was fantastic.

lol lol lol

Anyway hun take the advice from those too thats sure to change he views on it.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2008):

Its your right to refuse, would he swallow it? - I think not!

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A male reader, DoubleM United States +, writes (18 February 2008):

DoubleM agony auntIf he cares about you at all, Tish's suggestion should put it to rest. Some ladies like it, and some do not, and since you are one of the latter, don't do it.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2008):

It isnt something that you have to do, so stop worrying. He is lucky that you do it at all, some people outright refuse.

take care

xx

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A female reader, hello1 United Kingdom +, writes (18 February 2008):

hello1 agony auntTisha advice was brilliant!

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A female reader, TELLULAH United Kingdom +, writes (18 February 2008):

TELLULAH agony auntTish!!! how bloody funny. I love it.

On another note though! Sex is about having fun. And if you dont want him to do that in your mouth, say no.

Personally I think you should try Tish's advice, that will certainly do the trick.

XX

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (18 February 2008):

Tisha-1 agony auntThrow up once after he comes, making sure you make lots of gagging noises; he'll never ask you again.

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