A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hi i was wondering if anoyne could maybe help ok ill get to the pointme and my bf have been together for 2year and 5mnth like evrey relationship weve had are ups and downs but we get on really well it was his birthday not so long ago i didnt have much money so we planned to spend the night together and i would cook a meal for the two of us. His friend took him out during the day for a couple of pints before we met up so we were txting as normal before he went out. when we met up later that night he was in between being tipsy and being drunk. he looked into my eyes and told me he wanted me to read a text message he had wanted to send me before he went out the message said *sam* i wanted to ask if you wanted to get engaged i love you i always will foreverwhen i read the message i was totally shocked he told me that he really wanted to send it before he went out but he didnt have the courage to he said he'd had it planned for months he'd been going to town and looking at rings and that the only thing stopping him was that he didnt have a ring for me but he said i was really lucky he ddint have a ring. i didnt really understand why he had said this. He hasnt asked me or we havent really talked about it again until i mentioned my cousin getting engaged and he said that could of been me but he didnt even ask me he just showed me a text msg and then deleted it but why would he show me it and then not bother at all and i dont think that he will bother asking again in the future because the way he's put it over is as though ive said no to him but he didnt even ask im really upset by this and confused what do u guys think? any help will be appreciated thanks xxxx
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cousin, drunk, engaged, I love you, money, text Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhe's acting like it never happend why show me a message and half ask but not actually saying the words or getting down to one knee? why put me through that if he didnt want to be engaged then he should not have showed me the message he'd written or ever said anything about the whole thing because at the end of the day its got me wondering weather or not our relationship is going anywere u just dont do what he didi and not do anything about it its really bad and upsetting.
A
female
reader, fishdish  +, writes (20 July 2008):
 Why would you act like it never happened? If you act like that then it IS a form of rejecting his proposal, however awkward.
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A
female
reader, fishdish +, writes (18 July 2008):
You two are so materialistic! In your account of what happened, you don't mention your response besides questioning his action and then creeping around the incident and not discussing it, so why WOULDN"T he think you rejected him? neither of you sound serious enough to get married if neither of you will be adult enough to communicate about one of the most important decisions of your realtionship and lives together.
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A
female
reader, Yuna~  +, writes (18 July 2008):
 Maybe he wants you to talk to him about it. He's afraid you'll say no.
I know from a girl's point of view, we DO NOT want to be the one who mentions it. But if you don't, he'll think you are trying to say no by not talking about it. So I think you should plan a romantic dinner and let him know about it in advance. Hint at him that you will say yes if he asks. Maybe text message him back saying what kind of ring you'll like.
Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthe thing is though he wrote it str8 after he had finished txtin me and was scared to send it so he wasnt drunk when he wrote it it was before he went ouut. what do u thinki should do should i say anything about it or just act like im not bothered? xxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2008): If he didn't get down on bended knee offering you a rock attached to some gold in a nice blue flip-top box, and beg you to marry him he can't be that serious about it.
It's amazing the effect a few pints has on the tongue, and if I were you I'd put it down to him being slightly tipsy. Showing you a text message instead, that he'd written but couldn't afford to send, doesn't bode well for the future!
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